The Works of Ben Jonson/Volume 6/A Tale of a Tub/Act I/Scene III
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SCENE III.
Maribone.
A Room in justice Preamble's House.
Enter canon Hugh and justice Preamble.
Hugh. So you are sure, sir, to prevent them all,
And throw a block in the bridegroom's way, John Clay,
That he will hardly leap o'er.
And throw a block in the bridegroom's way, John Clay,
That he will hardly leap o'er.
Pre. I conceive you,
Sir Hugh; as if your rhetoric would say,
Whereas the father of her is a Turfe,
A very superficies of the earth;
He aims no higher than to match in clay,
And there hath pitch'd his rest.
Sir Hugh; as if your rhetoric would say,
Whereas the father of her is a Turfe,
A very superficies of the earth;
He aims no higher than to match in clay,
And there hath pitch'd his rest.
Hugh. Right, justice Bramble;
You have the winding wit, compassing all.
You have the winding wit, compassing all.
Pre. Subtle sir Hugh, you now are in the wrong,
And err with the whole neighbourhood, I must tell you,
For you mistake my name. Justice Preamble
I write myself; which, with the ignorant clowns here,
Because of my profession of the law,
And place of the peace, is taken to be Bramble:
But all my warrants, sir, do run Preamble,
Richard Preamble.
And err with the whole neighbourhood, I must tell you,
For you mistake my name. Justice Preamble
I write myself; which, with the ignorant clowns here,
Because of my profession of the law,
And place of the peace, is taken to be Bramble:
But all my warrants, sir, do run Preamble,
Richard Preamble.
Hugh. Sir, I thank you for it,
That your good worship would not let me run
Longer in error, but would take me up thus.
That your good worship would not let me run
Longer in error, but would take me up thus.
Pre. You are my learned and canonic neighbour,
I would not have you stray; but the incorrigible
Nott headed beast, the clowns, or constables,
Still let them graze, eat sallads, chew the cud:
All the town music will not move a log.
I would not have you stray; but the incorrigible
Nott headed beast, the clowns, or constables,
Still let them graze, eat sallads, chew the cud:
All the town music will not move a log.
Hugh. The beetle and wedges will where you will have them.
Pre. True, true, sir Hugh.
Enter Metaphor.
Here comes Miles Metaphor,
My clerk; he is the man shall carry it, canon,
By my instructions.
My clerk; he is the man shall carry it, canon,
By my instructions.
Hugh. He will do it ad unguem,
Miles Metaphor! he is a pretty fellow.
Miles Metaphor! he is a pretty fellow.
Pre. I love not to keep shadows, or half-wits,
To foil a business.—Metaphor, you have seen
A king ride forth in state.[1]
To foil a business.—Metaphor, you have seen
A king ride forth in state.[1]
Met. Sir, that I have:
King Edward our late liege, and sovereign lord;
And have set down the pomp.
King Edward our late liege, and sovereign lord;
And have set down the pomp.
Pre. Therefore I ask'd you.
Have you observ'd the messengers of the chamber,
What habits they were in?
Have you observ'd the messengers of the chamber,
What habits they were in?
Pre. Well mark'd!
You know not any of them?
You know not any of them?
Met. Here's one dwells
In Maribone.
In Maribone.
Pre. Have you acquaintance with him,
To borrow his coat an hour?
To borrow his coat an hour?
Hugh. Or but his badge,
'Twill serve; a little thing he wears on his breast.
'Twill serve; a little thing he wears on his breast.
Pre. His coat, I say, is of more authority:
Borrow his coat for an hour. I do love
To do all things completely, canon Hugh;
Borrow his coat, Miles Metaphor, or nothing.
Borrow his coat for an hour. I do love
To do all things completely, canon Hugh;
Borrow his coat, Miles Metaphor, or nothing.
Met. The taberd of his office I will call it,
Or the coat-armour of his place; and so
Insinuate with him by that trope.
Or the coat-armour of his place; and so
Insinuate with him by that trope.
Pre. I know
Your powers of rhetoric, Metaphor. Fetch him off
[Exit Metaphor.In a fine figure for his coat, I say.
Your powers of rhetoric, Metaphor. Fetch him off
[Exit Metaphor.In a fine figure for his coat, I say.
Hugh. I'll take my leave, sir, of your worship too,
Because I may expect the issue anon.
Because I may expect the issue anon.
Pre. Stay, my diviner counsel, take your fee:
We that take fees, allow them to our counsel;
And our prime learned counsel, double fees.
There are a brace of angels to support you
In your foot-walk this frost, for fear of falling,
Or spraying of a point of matrimony,
When you come at it
We that take fees, allow them to our counsel;
And our prime learned counsel, double fees.
There are a brace of angels to support you
In your foot-walk this frost, for fear of falling,
Or spraying of a point of matrimony,
When you come at it
Hugh. In your worship's service:
That the exploit is done, and you possest
Of mistress Awdrey Turfe.—
That the exploit is done, and you possest
Of mistress Awdrey Turfe.—
[Exit. Pre. I like your project.
Hugh. And I, of this effect of two to one;
It worketh in my pocket, 'gainst the 'squire,
And his half bottom here, of half a piece,
Which was not worth the stepping o'er the stile for:
His mother has quite marr'd him, lady Tub,
She's such a vessel of fæces: all dried earth,
Terra damnata! not a drop of salt,
[Exit.Or petre in her![3] all her nitre is gone.
It worketh in my pocket, 'gainst the 'squire,
And his half bottom here, of half a piece,
Which was not worth the stepping o'er the stile for:
His mother has quite marr'd him, lady Tub,
She's such a vessel of fæces: all dried earth,
Terra damnata! not a drop of salt,
[Exit.Or petre in her![3] all her nitre is gone.
- ↑ ———Metaphor, you have seen
A king ride forth in state.] Our old chronicles and historians are very large in their descriptions of such pageants: Holinshed and Stow give us many instances of the sovereign's riding in great state through the city, attended by his guards and nobles. Whal. - ↑ ——— a dragon and a grey-hound, &c] "Henry VII, a prince of the house of Tudor, in memory of their descent from Cadwallader, gave from his first accession, the red or rouge dragon, (when he also constituted Rouge Dragon pursuivant,) for the dexter supporter of his arms, with the grey-hound of the house of York on the left."
- ↑ ——— Not a drop of salt,
Or petre in her!] The quibble, such as it is, may possibly escape the reader; the poet means she had nothing of her husband's temper, who was sir Peter Tub. Whal.