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A VITAL QUESTION.
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that is wrote in your books; there it is wrote that one ought not to treat anybody as I was treated. 'You,' they say, 'are dishonest.' Now here's your father, for example; he's your father, but he was not Nádinka's father. He's a poor soul, yet he dared then to pick my eyes to reproach me. Nu, then the ill temper got the best of me, and I say that, judged by your standard, I ain't a good woman; but then I be as I be. Nádinka was born. Nu, what of that? Supposing she was born? Who taught me to do such things? How did your father get his place? My sin was much less than his. And they took her away from me, and they put her into the Foundling House; and it was impossible to find out what became of her, and so I never saw her, and I don't know whether she is among the livin' or not. Faith, how could she be alive! Nu, at the present time I should not have cared so much, but then it wa'n't so easy, and my temper got the best of me. Nu, and so I became cross. And since then everything has gone all right. Who got the situation for your father, fool that he is? I got it for him. And who got him promoted to be a manager? I did; and so we began to live comfortably. And why? Because I lost my temper and my good name! This I know. It's written in your books, Viérotchka, that it's only the wicked and ill-tempered who get along in this world; and that is gospel truth, Viérotchka! Now your father has lots of money, Viérotchka; and it was through me that he got it. And I too have money, and probably more than he has,—all through my exertions. I shall have bread enough for my last years. And your father, fool that he is, has begun to respect me, and he has to toe the line. I scold him well. But before, he used to treat me mean. And why was it? I didn't deserve it then. It must have been because I wa'n't ill-tempered. And it's written in your books, Viérotchka, that such a life is bad, and don't you suppose I know it? Yes, and it is written in your books, too, that to live otherwise one must reform things; but accordin' to the present way of the world one can't live as the books say. But why don't they reform the world? Ekh! Viérotchka, you think that I don't know what kind of rules are in your books. I know; they are fine. But we sha'n't live to see 'em, you and me. Folks is too stupid; how can you make reforms with such folks? Let's live in the old way. You too had better live in the old way. What are the old rules? In your books it is written; the old rule