wonderful modes, had passed by up, giving warning that we were approaching the fair. Soon the road became a muddy swamp, and we could see the farmers bustling about amongst the cows and sheep. One informed us as he rode by, that he had sold ten “beasts” for 32l. each, and seemed satisfied, as he well might be, with his bargain. From such stories we gathered that the agricultural mind deemed it a good fair. We, however, being simply bent on finding amusement, scanned with more eagerness than judgment the pens of cattle which skirted the road. There were the red Devon steers, the white-faced Hereford^, the neat-looking Kerries, smaller than the delicate Alderneys, but fully their equal in milk-producing qualities. Further on were herds of frightened Galloways, with large heads, liquid eyes, and coats black as night. Then came several Scotch drovers belabouring some curious specimens of the bovine race, which were not over amiable or “canny” after their long journey. Some black, others dun-coloured, but all shaggy, unkempt animals, with fire gleaming in their quick restless eyes, they would by no means be pleasant companions on one of their own wild moors. One could not help thinking of the wild cattle of Chillingham on looking at them, and the aurochs and uri of the vast Teutonic solitudes by the Rhine, where the Roman legions encamped, and enabled Cæsar to add to his stock of natural history. As may be supposed, this formed a very lively scene, diversified by the shouting of drovers and plunges of some maddened animal over the fences on one side of the road, as another took it into its playful head to run amuck down the centre. We passed through without any mishap, however, and proceeded to the market-place, where the interest of the fair centred.
It was very evident that, if business was the order of the day above in the cattle market, pleasure was to reign supreme here. There were the round-abouts, swings, nut-vendors, Cheap Jacks, &c., dear to boyhood. Yonder stall full of “real Grantham gingerbread” carried us back to other days at once, when one’s digestive organs could assimilate anything at any hour. Could you thus early in the morning eat gingerbread,—for the life of you now, actually an hour before lunch time? The country bumpkins speedily showed an observer how to do it, at any rate. They might be omnivorous, so indiscriminate was their onslaught on anything offered them,—boiled crabs, green apples, toffy, shrimps, &c. We will do the Phyllises justice, and say they were not backward in following the example of their swains in these delicate preludes to dinner. All were mirthful and noisy, with rough attempts at rustic wit, and when the appetite had been thus gently provoked, sallied on to the amusements.
The scene there was like Hogarth’s celebrated picture of the glories of old Southwark Fair. A medley of booths, shows, vehicles, mountebanks, fortune-tellers, and quacks occupied the central space. Here stood a man with four or five tame piebald rats, which he put on his shoulders and suffered to run over him, for the sake of attracting a crowd. We drew near, from curiosity, amongst them. “I am from forrin parts, and my accent will show you I know fourteen strange languages, and can converse in all cases correctly. I ’ave a ’andful of rat-poison ’ere—vary strong, and answers in all cases correctly” (this phrase came in at the end of every sentence, as being a very telling point with rustics). “Sprinkle a little between your finger and thumb in a stackyard, and you will see the varmint come out in swarms, like poultry to be fed. Buy a box of me, and you will clear your whole farm for a year; buy a dozen of them, and you exterminate the small hanimals from the country side! It is only for fear of cutting my own throat I refuse to sell any gentleman more than a dozen boxes, or else I should be starved out myself, for there’s not a rat would remain in the laud. Buy here! yoho! Answers in all cases correctly!” &c. &c.
From the quantity he sold we should suppose the natives were much troubled with these “small deer;” but clearly there are better times coming, now that this kind gentleman has appeared, for a dozen boxes at least were disposed of in no time.
Next we strolled on to a Cheap Jack, who indulged in the usual witticisms of his trade after the following sort:—
“Hooks and eyes! who’ll buy?—sixpence the lot! Such hooks and—my eyes! Thank you, ma’am,—here you are! Hurrah! Sold again!—sold again!—sold!—sold again!
“A knife for killing pigs or mending pens—what shall I say for this? I will give it away for eightpence—given away for eightpence! Thank you, ma’am,—please the pigs, you’ll save it in butchers’ meat, ma’am, in a week alone. Hurrah! Sold again!—sold!—sold!—sold again!”
This ejaculation probably suited both parties to the transaction equally well.
So on, backwards and forwards did he skip in shirtsleeves and a brilliant waistcoat, active, amusing, and energetic. It was curious to note the impassive faces of the buyers. Like all Englishmen, they evidently took their pleasure sadly. They traded on the principle of sailors, to get rid of superfluous cash at once, or else they had deep economic schemes, like the minerals lying under their familiar clay, which ordinary men cannot discern, to judge from the incongruous purchases they made. A small boy, not long breeched, for instance, bought the hooks and eyes; hedging gloves would be carried off by girls, necklaces by old men; a ploughboy of fourteen invested in a large wicker-work plate-basket, partly, we suppose, from the high recommendation that “it would suit any one or anything—this invaluable tray—the butler for his forks, the nursemaid for a cradle,—sold again!” and then the vendor informed the audience in a stage whisper, “that ere young man as has bought it, is a family man, they tell me, and means to use that little harticle for a perambulator!”
No need to tell of the scene in the public-houses; such things are too well known in most country districts. We will pass by where the stamping up-stairs indicates that thus early in the day dancing is going on. Of course the younger men are vigorously pulling at long clay-pipes round the doors, and the elder ones leaning against