Page:The Green Bag (1889–1914), Volume 01.pdf/119

This page needs to be proofread.
The Green Bag.


98

And to sustain this goodly plea, He straight a witness seeks To swear what common horse could eat, In eight and one-half weeks. He endeavoreth to put in certain evidence, but the Judge preventeth.

But mark the niceties of law! Carlton did there object, And promptly did the learned Judge The evidence reject.

And giveth his reasons therefor.

Defendant's The Justice And so was Concerning

was no common horse, did explain; no criterion hay and grain.

Whether it was, that, being sick, He ravenous had grown, Or that he was a Pegasus, Is not quite clearly shown. Prudent rule of conduct to be drawn from the learned Court's decree.

But from the learned Court's decree Most surely we may read, The only safe proceeding is, To own a common steed. So, all ye lovers of the horse, That is the friend of man, Be warned in time by this decree, Adopt the safer plan!

Advice to the lovers of good horses.

For if your spicy trotters, Or high-bred barbs you keep In public stable, much expense And trouble you may reap.

Showeth the dangers which beset a contrary course.

For stable-keeper may depose In good set terms, and say He 's fed your nag on terrapins And squabs, in lieu of hay. In vain indignant you'll protest! In vain you 'll earnest plead, That this is not good equine food! yours is no common steed. So shun to buy fine-blooded stock; 'T is fraught with sore remorse. Lower your pride, and humbly keep An " ordinary " horse!