Page:The Green Bag (1889–1914), Volume 12.pdf/286

This page needs to be proofread.

Esquires and Gentlemen. Oh, happy Britons! happy isle Î Let foreign nations say. Where you get justice without guile And law without delay.

There are, it is to be feared, some persons, both lawyers and laymen, who would sub scribe to the following rejoinder by some dis senting humorist : Deluded men. these holds forego, Nor trust such cunning elves : These artful emblems tend to show Their clients, not themselves. 'Tis all a trick; these all are shams By which they mean to cheat you; But have a care, for you're the lambs, And they the wolves that eat you. Nor let the thought of •• no delay" To these their courts misguide you; 'Tis you're the showy horse, and they The jockeys that will ride you.

This same book montions a curious trial in which the question of a person's right to the title of gentleman was at stake. It seems a horse race had been run, the condi tion being that each rider should be a gen tleman. The winner, a man of some seventy years of age, was challenged as not comply ing with this condition. The matter came before the court in the evening, the other competitors, young men of large fortunes and M. P.'s, being subpoenaed as witnesses. They came into court after a libation at an hotel, by no means sober, booted, spurred, splashed, and dirty from their ride into town. The delay in hearing the case caused them to become rude to the judge, the jury, and the counsel for the defendant. The latter began his speech by saying that he feared

259

he must throw up his brief, for he despaired of proving his client to be a gentleman when he saw the conduct of persons who, from the nature of the case, must be presumed to be beyond dispute gentlemen. He remarked that in comparison with these persons his client was at a disadvantage, inasmuch as he was sober and respectful to the court. He was, moreover, clean, decent, and in comely apparel. Judging by these appearances, and comparing his client with these gentlemen, he feared that he must give way, inasmuch as being sober, civil, and cleanly, he could not be such a gentleman as they were. His client was also degraded, for his income was small, but entirely unencumbered; nor did he ever exceed it nor squander it, never gam bled, never ran into debt. He brought up his family in a plain and frugal manner, he set them the exampleof a moral and religious life. He was, in fine, a good Christian, husband, father, master, neighbor, and friend. The learned counsel further stated that it was in respect for a promise to a dead friend's son that he rode in the race, and concluded that it remained for the court and jury to say whether his opponents were right in holding that his client did not come up to their ideas of a gentleman. It appears that this sarcastic tirade was successful, the satisfactory deci sion being hailed with the loudest acclama tions. The identity of this advocate is not revealed, but the book states that the trial took place not long before 1823, and that he rose to one of the highest positions in Westminster Hall and to the dignity of a peerage. — The Law Times.