640
THE GREEN BAG
Recommendation for Clemency "An extenuating circumstance?" The judge was much surprised; The prisoner hung his head and said, "My doctor so advised." "But you admit you stole the cash —" "Oh, yes, but that's not strange For when the doctor left his bill He said I needed change." (S. I. Litchfield.) Butler Found a Way Out. —- When Gen. B. F. Btitler's office was in Pemberton Square a druggist from Cambridge Street called upon him for advice. The druggist said he had just finished remodelling his store, putting in fancy shelving, etc., and that when all was done the landlord had raised his rent. He told the landlord that, before he would pay the additional rent, he would move, and the landlord said: " You can move if you want to; but, according to the law in Massachusetts, you can't draw a nail in that new shelving." Butler looked toward the ceiling a moment; then, turning to the druggist, he said: "Your landlord is right. According to the law, you cannot draw a nail, but you can easily remove the shelves." Then his voice assumed a louder tone, as he said: " There is no law under God's heaven that will prevent driving those nails in." — Boston Herald. Testimony. — Paul Murry, a French Cana dian, who is employed as watchman at the Maine Central roundhouse in Skowhegan, Me., was called some years ago before the Somerset County Court to testify against a man accused of larceny. The lawyer for the plaintiff asked Murry to tell the jury where he saw the man, what he was doing, and what he had in his hands.
Murry took the stand and in a drawling tone said: " Well, she was coming up the rail road track and she had a valukus in one hand and a tronk in de oder." Here he stopped and began to scratch his head and then ex claimed in a loud voice: " And she had a lantern in de oder hand." The lawyer for the defendant jumped up and said: " Now look a-here, Mr. Muny, how many hands do you think this man has?" Murry replied: " Well, if you know more about it than I did you can tell it." and he left the stand. — Boston Herald. A Leg Worth More Than a Man. — Jesse James, the noted outlaw's son, is, at the age of 30, one of the most talented and respected lawyers of Kansas City. In a claims case that he recently won Mr. James told an amusing story. "There was a woman," he said, " whose husband was killed in a railway accident. The railroad, to avoid suit, gave her $5000 damages. "The sum satisfied the woman, but a month or two afterward, taking up a newspaper, she read about a man who had lost his leg in the same accident, and behold, this man was given by the company damages to the amount of $7500. "It made the woman mad. She hastened at once to the office of the railway's claim adjuster. She said bitterly: "' How is this? Here you give a man $7500 for the loss of his leg, while you only gave me $5000 for the loss of my husband.' "The claim adjuster smiled amiably and said in a soothing voice:
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"' Madam, the reason is quite plain. The $7500 won't provide the poor man with a new leg, whereas with your $5000 you can easily get a new husband, and perhaps a better one.'
