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Page:The Works of Lord Byron (ed. Coleridge, Prothero) - Volume 1.djvu/449

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407
HINTS FROM HORACE.

Yet cursing both—for both have made him sore:
Unread (unless since books beguile disease,
The P—x becomes his passage to Degrees);
Fooled, pillaged, dunned, he wastes his terms away,[1]
And unexpelled, perhaps, retires M.A.;240
Master of Arts! as hells and clubs[2] proclaim,[3]
Where scarce a blacklesr bears a brighter name!


Launched into life, extinct his early fire,
He apes the selfish prudence of his Sire;
Marries for money, chooses friends for rank,
Buys land, and shrewdly trusts not to the Bank;
Sits in the Senate; gets a son and heir;
Sends him to Harrow—for himself was there.
Mute, though he votes, unless when called to cheer,
His son's so sharp—he'll see the dog a Peer!250


Manhood declines—Age palsies every limb;
He quits the scene—or else the scene quits him;
Scrapes wealth, o'er each departing penny grieves,[4]

And Avarice seizes all Ambition leaves;
  1. The better years of youth he wastes away.—[MS. L. (a).]
  2. "Hell," a gaming-house so called, where you risk little, and are cheated a good deal. "Club," a pleasant purgatory, where you lose more, and are not supposed to be cheated at all.
  3. Master of Arts, as all the Clubs proclaim.—[MS. L. (b).]
  4. Scrapes wealth, o'er Grandam's endless jointure grieves.—[MS. erased.]
    O'er Grandam's mortgage, or young hopeful's debts.—[MS. L'. (a).]
    O'er Uncle's mortgage.—[MS. L. (b).]