Shakespeare - First Folio facsimile (1910)/The Two Gentlemen of Verona/Act 2 Scene 5
Scena Quinta.
Enter Speed and Launce.
Speed.
Launce, by mine honesty welcome to Padua.
Launce, by mine honesty welcome to Padua.
Laun.
Forsweare not thy selfe, sweet youth, for I am
not welcome. I reckon this alwaies, that a man is neuer
vndon till hee be hang'd, nor neuer welcome to a place,
till some certaine shot be paid, and the Hostesse say welcome.
Forsweare not thy selfe, sweet youth, for I am
not welcome. I reckon this alwaies, that a man is neuer
vndon till hee be hang'd, nor neuer welcome to a place,
till some certaine shot be paid, and the Hostesse say welcome.
Speed.
Come-on you mad-cap: Ile to the Ale-house
with you presently; where, for one shot of fiue pence,
thou shalt haue fiue thousand welcomes: But sirha, how
did thy Master part with Madam Iulia?
Come-on you mad-cap: Ile to the Ale-house
with you presently; where, for one shot of fiue pence,
thou shalt haue fiue thousand welcomes: But sirha, how
did thy Master part with Madam Iulia?
Lau.
Marry after they cloas'd in earnest, they parted
very fairely in iest.
Marry after they cloas'd in earnest, they parted
very fairely in iest.
Spee.
But shall she marry him?
But shall she marry him?
Lau.
No.
No.
Spee.
How then? shall he marry her?
How then? shall he marry her?
Lau.
No, neither.
No, neither.
Spee.
What, are they broken?
What, are they broken?
Lau.
No; they are both as whole as a fish.
No; they are both as whole as a fish.
Spee.
Why then, how stands the matter with them?
Why then, how stands the matter with them?
Lau.
Marry thus, when it stands well with him, it
stands well with her.
Marry thus, when it stands well with him, it
stands well with her.
Spee.
What an asse art thou, I vnderstand thee not.
What an asse art thou, I vnderstand thee not.
Lau.
What a blocke art thou, that thou canst not?
My staffe vnderstands me?
What a blocke art thou, that thou canst not?
My staffe vnderstands me?
Spee.
What thou saist?
What thou saist?
Lau.
I, and what I do too: looke thee, Ile but leane,
and my staffe vnderstands me.
I, and what I do too: looke thee, Ile but leane,
and my staffe vnderstands me.
Spee.
It stands vnder thee indeed.
It stands vnder thee indeed.
Lau.
Why, stand-vnder: and vnder-stand is all one.
Why, stand-vnder: and vnder-stand is all one.
Spee.
But tell me true, wil't be a match?
But tell me true, wil't be a match?
Lau.
Aske my dogge, if he say I, it will: if hee say
no, it will: if hee shake his taile, and say nothing, it will.
Aske my dogge, if he say I, it will: if hee say
no, it will: if hee shake his taile, and say nothing, it will.
Spee.
The conclusion is then, that it will.
The conclusion is then, that it will.
Lau.
Thou shalt neuer get such a secret from me, but
by a parable.
Thou shalt neuer get such a secret from me, but
by a parable.
Spee.
'Tis well that I get it so: but Launce, how saist
thou that that my master is become a notable Louer?
'Tis well that I get it so: but Launce, how saist
thou that that my master is become a notable Louer?
Lau.
I neuer knew him otherwise.
I neuer knew him otherwise.
Spee.
Then how?
Then how?
Lau.
A notable Lubber: as thou reportest him to bee.
A notable Lubber: as thou reportest him to bee.
Spee.
Why, thou whorson Asse, thou mistak'st me.
Why, thou whorson Asse, thou mistak'st me.
Lau.
Why Foole, I meant not thee, I meant thy
Master.
Why Foole, I meant not thee, I meant thy
Master.
Spee.
I tell thee, my Master is become a hot Louer.
I tell thee, my Master is become a hot Louer.
Lau.
Why, I tell thee, I care not, though hee burne
himselfe in Loue. If thou wilt goe with me to the Alehouse:
if not, thou art an Hebrew, a Iew, and not worth
the name of a Christian.
Why, I tell thee, I care not, though hee burne
himselfe in Loue. If thou wilt goe with me to the Alehouse:
if not, thou art an Hebrew, a Iew, and not worth
the name of a Christian.
Spee.
Why?
Why?
Lau.
Because thou hast not so much charity in thee as
to goe to the Ale with a Christian: Wilt thou goe?
Because thou hast not so much charity in thee as
to goe to the Ale with a Christian: Wilt thou goe?
Spee.
At thy seruice.
Exeunt.
At thy seruice.
Exeunt.