Memoirs of James Hardy Vaux/Volume 1/Chapter 4
CHAPTER IV.
SHORTLY after my return from Liverpool, finding the narrow limits of a small market-town too circumscribed for my active disposition; and nothing having been determined on, as to my future disposal, I entreated my parents to let me go to London, which I had always considered as the grand field for talents of every description; and where I doubted not of forwarding myself, by the exercise of those I possessed. They at length consented, and after the necessary preparations, I set out, receiving the blessings and prayers of these indulgent benefactors, and moderately supplied with money for my reasonable necessities.
My grandfather had of course many acquaintances in London, of his own profession, to several of whom he furnished me with letters of recommendation; it being his wish, that I should by a few months' practice in a law office, ascertain how far I was disposed to be articled for the usual period, necessary to procure my admission. I had always been prepossessed in favour of this profession, which I knew from my reading and experience, to abound in variety, and, if I may be allowed the phrase, in pleasing perplexity.
On my arrival in town, I waited first on a relation of our family, Mr. P———, a young man lately established in the profession, and received as a partner by Mr. M——, a gentleman of large fortune, and extensive practice, who would, it was probable, in a few years' time, retire from business in favour of my cousin.
The latter received me very kindly, and without hesitation, offered to employ me (with his partner's concurrence) as copying clerk, at a weekly salary, which to a youth like me, was of course but small.
As I conceived this offer too advantageous to be rejected, I thankfully embraced it, and immediately entered on my function in Lincoln's-Inn New Square.
As I had no motives of affection to attract me to my father's house, I determined on becoming master of my own conduct; and accordingly took a neat private lodging, and regulated my mode of life conformably to the state of my finances. I breakfasted at home, dined at a tavern or genteel eating-house, and in the evening took my tea and read the papers at a coffee-house: after which I sometimes passed the night in reading at home, but most commonly went to one of the theatres at half-price, where I gratified my violent passion for the drama, which at once improved my understanding and amused my mind.
This course of life, though it rapidly weakened my purse, was rational, compared to that which I soon after led, and I might have supported it with credit, by the indulgence of my friends, for a considerable time. As the business of our office was of a various nature, I soon gained great experience in the different branches of common law, and conveyancing: I became by practice, an expert and correct copyist; and I delighted much in studying the most approved law books, reading reports of cases, &c. I became familiar with Burn's Justice, and soon gained a pretty correct knowledge of the criminal law, and of those minute points, of which an able counsel or attorney can avail himself, in order to rescue a client from the claws of justice, howsoever glaring and palpable his guilt may be. Such is the glorious uncertainty of the English law! Little did I then conceive how useful this knowledge might one day prove to myself; of which more hereafter. I merely pursued this intricate study by way of exercising my ingenuity and gratifying my curiosity.
I must here inform the reader, that these various pursuits and studies were not confined to the short term of my continuance in the employ of which I am now writing. After I quitted the office of Messrs. M——— and P———, and during the course of a wild and dissipated life, they formed one of my favourite domestic amusements; as did in fact reading in general: and throughout the most profligate stages of my future career, which I shall hereafter narrate, a portion of my time was always devoted to the perusal of books, and a part of my money, however hardly or dishonestly obtained, to the purchase of them: and to this moment I still consider them the most valuable property a man of my disposition can possess.
About three months after my arrival in town, I began to grow less regular in my manner of life; my expenses increased; and I became negligent of the office hours. I had contracted an intimacy with several young persons of both sexes, which unavoidably engaged me in a course of expensive dissipation, to which my means were inadequate. Though I occasionally derived small supplies from my grandfather, yet as he had no idea of the extent of my expenditure, they were comparatively trifling. Mr. P——— finding I was not to be reclaimed by advice, and having no authority to use any other means, at length for the credit of his office, and for fear I should contaminate the other clerks, gave me a formal, though civil dismissal, which I received without surprise, as I knew I had long deserved it.
I was now tired of the law, or rather of the restraint I was under, in an office of that description; but still I found necessary to have some employment, as well to amuse me, as to contribute to my support.
I therefore engaged myself as assistant in the warehouse of Messrs. Key and Sons, wholesale stationers in Abchurch-lane, Lombard-street, at a weekly salary of one guinea; which was more by half than I had received from my last employers, and equal to the pay of an experienced clerk in an attorney's office at that time of day. This situation I obtained through the interest of one of my fellow-rakes, the son of a substantial citizen, who roundly vouched for my integrity and diligent conduct. My employment here was to superintend the packing of goods for exportation and home consumption; to write invoices; copy letters; ship goods at the Custom-house, &c. I continued, however, but a short time in this situation; confinement to the east end of the town prevented my associating with my old acquaintances, who chiefly dwelt in the environs of Covent-garden, or the purlieus of Drury-lane.
During an abode of ten months in London, as I was frequently pushed for money, I availed myself of a genteel appearance, and pretty good address, and taking advantage of the credulity of several tradesmen in the neighbourhood, I ordered wearing apparel of various kinds, and sometimes other goods, upon credit, without much concern about the day of payment; however I always took care to procure a bill of parcels with the articles, which precluded any charge of fraud, and left the matter at the worst but a debt contracted; for which, being a minor, I knew I could not be arrested. This was my first deviation from honesty, since I left Liverpool. I was also frequently obliged to change my lodgings; and, as payment of my rent would have required ready money, for which I had so many other uses, I commonly decamped under favour of the night, having previously removed my effects by various stratagems. As I was ashamed to let my grand-father know the true state of my affairs, and as I really grieved at the expenses I had already caused him, which I knew had much inconvenienced him, I forbore at last, to trouble him for remittances; but falsely assured him that I was doing well, and enabled to live upon the profits of my industry. I desired he would abandon the idea of articling me to the law, as the expenses attending admission had of late years been so much increased by stamp duties; and as I could, if I continued the study, at a future period, practise under the sanction of another person's name; a custom then very prevalent, though irregular. By these assurances I quieted the good old man, and silenced any inquiries my friends might have instituted respecting me; as I now really wished to continue free from all restraint upon my person or actions, and foolishly flattered myself that I should by some lucky event, ultimately secure the means of independence. These conjectures were, however, perfectly vague, and proceeding from no fixed idea whatever.
On quitting my city employment, I returned to the law, for which I still retained a partiality; and obtained a more liberal salary than before in an office equally respectable. Indeed I was now become more useful, and had improved much both in person and address since my arrival in town.
I was still frequently reduced to pecuniary straits, and obliged to have recourse to various expedients, known only to men of the town, for my support: some of them indeed were bordering on dishonesty, and none of them very honourable. But to describe them individually, is impossible, and a man who lives by his wits, as the phrase is, will assure you, if called to account, that he really could not for his life, tell by what distinct means he makes out a living.
As I now wrote uncommonly fast, I quitted the station of a weekly clerk, and obtained writings to copy by the sheet, from the law stationers, by which I could earn considerably more money; and in this employment I continued to labour diligently for several hours every day, and sometimes half the night.
When I had a mind to relax from this occupation, and particularly if my finances were at a low ebb, I frequently resorted to the Blue Lion, in Gray's-Inn-Lane, a house noted for selling fine ale, and crowded every night with a motley assemblage of visiters, among whom were many thieves, sharpers and other desperate characters, with their doxies. I was introduced to this house (from which hundreds of young persons may date their ruin) by a fellow-clerk, who appeared to have a personal intimacy with most of these obnoxious persons; however, though I listened eagerly to their conversation, (part of which was then unintelligible to me), and fancied them people of uncommon spirit, I was not yet sufficiently depraved to cultivate their acquaintance; but sat with a pipe in my mouth, enveloped in smoke, ruminating like a philosopher on the various characters who tread the great stage of life, and felt a sort of secret presentiment, that I was myself born to undergo a more than common share of vicissitudes and disappointments. How far these ideas were well grounded, the reader will judge when he has perused this narrative, of which I shall here close the fourth Chapter.