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The FABLES of Poggius.
Fab. CCCLXIII.
An Aſs taught Grammar.
THere was a Bold Undertaking Pedant, Wager'd his Neck againſt a certain Sum of Mony, that in Ten Years time he would Teach an Aſs to Write, Read, and Chop Logick. His Friends called him a Thouſand Mad-men for caſting away his Life upon ſo Abſolute an Impoſſibility. Pray Gentlemen (ſays the Undertaker) have but a little Patience; for 'tis odds, that before the Term's out, either the Prince Dyes, (that's a Party to the Contract,) or the Aſs Dyes, or the Adventurer Dyes, and then the Danger's over.
The Moral.
Colluſion without Malice, is in many Caſes, not only Landable but Neceſſary.
REFLEXION.
There are ſome Caſes wherein a Man may Juſtify ſome ſort of Shuffling and Evading, without any Offence to Honour or Good Faith; as in a caſe for the Purpoſe, where the gaining of Time, may be as much as a Man's Life or Eſtate is worth. Some Men are but one Remove from ſome Aſſes, and the difficulty of Teaching the one, is next door to the impoſſibility of Teaching the other. The very Propoſition is a Whimſy Pleaſant enough, to ſhew the Vanity of attempting to make a Philoſopher of a Blockhead: Neither is it of a Quality to be underſtood according to the Letter. So that in ſuch a caſe, if a Man can but ſave himſelf by a Shift, or a Figure, 'tis all that can be deſired; and the Conditions naturally implied, fall within the fair Equity of the Queſtion. There are certain Bounds and Terms of Raillery that may very well ſtand with the Rules of Honeſty and Good Manners that is to ſay, Where the Liberty carries neither Malice, Saucineſs, nor Ill Nature along with it: And the diſcreet manage of ſuch a ſort of Freedom, betwixt Jeſt and Earneſt, Seaſons the Entertainment of an Agreeable Converſation. We ſhonld ſay to our ſelves in all our Diſtreſſes upon the apprehenſion of Temporal Difficulties to come, as this Pedant in the Fable did to his Relations and Companions; Let it be Bondage, Loſs of Friends, Beggery, Baniſhment, nay Death it ſelf, [This or that way Intervene.] It is an Unaccountable weakneſs for a Man to put himſelf upon the Torture at preſent, for fear ſomebody elſe ſhould Torment him Seven Years hence. Is it not enough for us to be Miſerable when the time comes, unleſs we make our ſelves ſo Beforehand, and by Anticipation? When we have gone as far as Conſcience, Honour, Induſtry, and Human Prudence can carry us, toward the preventing, or the averting of the Danger that threatens us, we are to remit the reſt to Providence, and wait the good Pleaſureof
