Page:Karl Gjellerup - The Pilgrim Kamanita - 1911.djvu/178

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THE PILGRIM KAMANITA

self-invented oracle bore a favourable interpretation, I was able to feel happy for a whole day or even longer, and to look hopefully into the future. But just for that very reason my longing increased, and with the longing my fears returned as naturally as evil dreams result from a fevered temperature.

In this condition it was almost a benefit that, after a short time, my love was not permitted to live in lonely inactivity dedicated to suffering alone, but that it was forced into a combative attitude and obliged to gather up all its strength even if it did thereby bring me to the verge of a complete estrangement from my own people.

It was in this way. Satagira, the son of the minister, pursued me ever more assiduously now with tokens of his love, and I could no longer show myself in a public pleasure-garden with my companions without his being there and making me the object of his obtrusive attentions. That I didn't respond to these in the least but, on the contrary, showed him, even more plainly than was polite, how hateful they were to me, had not the slightest deterrent effect upon him. Soon, however, my parents began, first with all kinds of hints, then with less and less reserve, to plead his cause, and when he finally came forward to press his suit openly, they demanded that I should give him my hand. I assured them, with bitter tears, that I could never love Satagira. That, however, made little impression upon them. But just as little was I affected by their representations, their prayers, and their reproaches, and remained insensible alike to the pleading of my mother and the threats of my father.

Driven to bay, I finally told them straight out that I had promised myself to thee—of whom they had already heard from Satagira—and that no power on earth could