162
CHARLES THE SECOND
Copp. Well, I suppose I must begin.—Oddsfish! I had it all settled in my head, and now, the deuce a word can I muster up.
Mary. Come, uncle, courage! I never saw you so cast down before.
Copp. Well, then, what I have to say is this—Mr. King.—(Low.) Hey, Mary, what is it I had to say?
Chas. What is your name, my good friend?
Copp. Copp, at your service; that is to say, Coppland, or Captain Copp, as they call me. And here's Mary, my niece, who, though I say it, is one of the best girls—
(While talking, he looks down and fumbles with his cap.)
Mary. But, that's not the point, uncle.
Copp. Eh! true, very true, always keep to the point, like a good helmsman. First and foremost, then, you must know, my lord—when I say my lord, I mean your majesty.
Chas. (Apart.) Egad, he's as much puzzled as I was, to give an account of myself.
Copp. (Still looking down.) In finis—primo to begin—you must know, then, that I command, that is to say, I keep the Grand Admiral, as honest a tavern as your majesty would wish to set your foot in—none but good company ever frequent it, excepting when a rogue or so drops in, in disguise—last night, for instance, a couple of gallows knaves, saving your majesty's presence—Ah! if I could only lay eyes on them again—I should know 'em, wherever I saw 'em—one in particular had a confounded hanging look—a man about the height of—(Eyeing Rochester, stops short.) Mary! Mary! if there isn't one of the very rogues!
Mary. My dear uncle, hush, for heaven's sake! (Apart.) That wine is still in his head.
Chas. (Apart.) Rochester's face seems to puzzle him.
Copp. I'll say no more; for the more I look—(Low to Mary.) hang me, if it is n't himself.
Mary. Hush, I entreat you—I will speak for you—(Takes his place, her eyes still modestly cast down.) My uncle has thought it his duty to inform your majesty, that two strangers came to his house last night, and after calling for a great deal of wine, were unable to pay, and went off, leaving a valuable watch in pledge, which has proved to belong to your majesty. (Rochester and Lady Clara in bye play express great delight at the manner of Mary.)
Copp. (Apart, rubbing his hands.) Oh! bless her! she talks like a book.
Mary. My uncle being an honest man, has brought the watch to your majesty.
Copp. Yes, by St. George, and here it is. The sharpers, to be sure, have run off with five pounds ten of my money, but that's neither here nor there—I don't say that, because I expect you to pay it, you know.—In short, without more palaver, (Crossing, and giving it.) here's the watch—(Glancing at the King, stops short, and gives a long whistle.) whew! (Treads softly back.)—(Low to Mary.) Smite my timbers! if it be n't the other rogue!
Mary. What ails you, uncle? surely, you are losing your senses to speak thus of his majesty!
Copp. (Low to her.) Majesty, or no majesty, I'll put my hand in the fire on't he's the other.
Chas. The watch is certainly mine.
Lady C. Your majesty's?
(Smiling significantly at Rochester.)
Roch. (Affecting astonishment.) Your majesty's watch?
[Chas. Even so; and I might have lost it, but for this man's honesty. I shall be more on my guard in future.
(Looking sternly at Rochester.)
Mary. (Looking at Charles and Rochester.) The voice and the face are astonishingly alike. But it is impossible.]
Copp (Rapping his forehead.) I have it—I see how it is.—(Low to Mary.) We've made a pretty kettle of fish of it. The king, you know, is said to cruise under false colours.
Mary. Mercy on me! what will become of us?
Copp. (To Mary.) Let me alone—it's one of the king's mad frolics—but never you mind—I'll get you off—(Aloud.) Your majesty will not be angry with my little fool of a niece. The two strangers might be very worthy people—many a man has a gallows look, and is an honest fellow for all that.—The truth is, they were a brace of merry wags.—Besides, if I had known for certain, I would n't for the world—ha! ha!—because, d'ye see—honour bright—mum! (Turning to
