Now, what is it to be his disciples? It is to renounce one's self, to carry his cross, to follow him. Are you mortified in your desires, patient under your afflictions? Do you walk in the ways in which Jesus Christ hath walked before you? To be his disciples is mutually to love each other. And how often have you come to eat of this bread of union? How often have you made your appearance at this banquet of charity, your heart inwardly loaded with gall and bitterness against your brother? How often have you come to offer up your present at the altar, without having reconciled yourself with him?
Lastly. It is a God so pure, that the stars are dimmed in his presence: so holy, that, after the fall of the angel, heaven was rent and the abyss opened that he might place an eternal chaos between sin and him; so jealous, that a single wandering desire injures and offends him. Thus, my brethren, it is necessary that you examine yourselves upon your own inclinations. Are not those desires of the age of which the apostle speaks, still nourished within you? Render glory to God, and, in his presence, search your hearts to the bottom. I go to eat of the body of Jesus Christ, and to convert it into my own substance; but when he shall have entered into my soul, he who knows and discerns its intentions and most secret inclinations, will he find nothing there unworthy of the sanctity of his presence? He will immediately proceed to the spring and to the causes of my wanderings; he will examine whether their source be dried up, or their course only suspended; he will perceive what are still the dominant inclinations of my soul, and what is the weight which still turns the balance of my heart: alas! will he be enabled to say, as formerly when entering into the house of Zaccheus, " This day is salvation come to this house?" Have I sincerely cast off that passion so fatal to my innocence; that bitterness of heart, of which I have so lately expressed my detestation at the feet of the priest; that idolizing of riches, which leads me to grasp at even iniquitous profits; that madness of gaming, by which my health, my affairs, and my salvation are injured; that vexatious and variable temper, which the slightest contradiction inflames; that vanity which leads me to soar above the rank in which my ancestors had left me; that envy which, with malignant eyes, has always viewed the reputation and the prosperity of my equals; that proud and censorious air, which judges upon all, and never judges itself; that supreme influence over me of effeminacy and voluptuousness, which are, as it were, interwoven with the foundation and principle of my being? Has the avowal, which I come from making, of my weaknesses, to the minister of Jesus Christ, rooted them out from my heart? Am I a new creature? He alone who is regenerated can aspire to this heavenly bread which I am going to eat: in thine eyes am I so, O my God? Do I not bear the name of living, though still, in effect, dead? Will the Mighty, entering into my soul, possess it in peace, and will he not find there seven unclean spirits who shall chase him from it? Instruct me, Lord, and suffer not that thy Christ, that thy Holy, descend
