trials; peace and felicity are only for heaven; but, notwithstanding this, I say that it is unjust to form, from the disagreeable circumstances which may accompany virtue in this life, a pretext either to abandon God when we have begun to serve him, or to be afraid to serve him when we have begun to know him.
Behold my reasons: in the first place, because disgusts are inevitable in this life; secondly, because those of piety are not so bitter as we imagine them to be; thirdly, because they are less so than those of the world; fourthly, because, were they equally so, they yet possess resources which those of the world have not. Let us investigate those edifying truths, and implore the assistance of divine grace toward their proper explanations.
Reflection I. — I say, in the first place, because disgusts are inevitable in this life. Alas! we complain that the service of God disgusts us; but such is the condition of this miserable life. Man, born fully to enjoy God, cannot be happy here below, where he can never but imperfectly possess him. Disgusts are a necessary consequence of the inquietude of a heart which is out of its place, and is unable to find it on the earth; which seeks to fix itself, but cannot with all the created beings which surround it; which, disgusted with every thing else, attaches itself to God; but being unable to possess him as fully as it is capable of doing, feels always that something is wanting to its happiness; agitates itself, in order to attain it, but can never completely reach it here; finds in virtue almost the same void and the same disgusts it had found in sin, because, to whatever degree of grace it may be exalted, there still remains much to accomplish before it can arrive at that fulness of righteousness and love which will possess our whole heart — will fill all our desires — extinguish all our passions — occupy all our thoughts — and which we can never find but in heaven.
Were it possible to be happy in this world, we should undoubtedly be so in serving God, because grace calms our passions, moderates our desires, consoles our sufferings, and gives us a foretaste of that perfect happiness we expect, and which we shall not enjoy but in a blessed immortality. Of all the situations in which man can find himself in this life, that of righteousness undoubtedly brings him nearest to felicity; but as it always leaves him in the path which conducts to it, it leaves him likewise still uneasy, and, in one sense miserable.
We are therefore unjust to complain of the disgusts which accompany virtue. Did the world make its followers happy, we should then have reason to be dissatisfied at not being so in the service of God. We might then accuse him of using his servants ill; of depriving them of a happiness which is due to them alone; that, far from attracting, he rejects them; and that the world is preferable to him, as a more consoling and faithful master. But examine all stations; interrogate all sinners; consult in rotation the partisans of all the different pleasures which the world promises and the different passions which it inspires; the envious, the
