Holmes. I can't, but somebody else can.
Driver. 'Ere, 'ere. (Trying to urge Holmes to chair.)
Holmes. You are a very disagreeable man! You are totally uninformed on every subject! I wonder you are able to live in the same house with yourself.
(The Driver is trying to talk back and make Holmes sit down. Holmes turns suddenly on Parsons on his R. Watson is trying to attract Parsons' attention.)
Are you a driver?
Parsons. No, sir!
Holmes. Well, what are you?
Parsons. I'm the butler, sir.
Holmes. Butler! Butler!
Driver. He's the doctor's servant.
Holmes. Who'd have such a looking butler as you! What fool would
Driver (turning Holmes toward him roughly). He is the doctor's servant!
Holmes. Who asked you who he was?
Driver. Never mind who asked me—I'm telling you.
Holmes. Well, go and tell somebody else.
Driver (trying to push Holmes into chair). Sit down here! Sit down and be quiet.
Watson (to Parsons). Have a cab ready for me. I must see if he's badly hurt.
Parsons. Yes, sir. (Exits.)
Holmes (resisting). Quiet! quiet! Where's my hat? My hat! My hat!
Driver. Never mind your 'at.
Holmes. I will mind my hat! and I hold you responsible
Driver. There's your 'at in your 'and.
Holmes (looks at hat). That isn't my hat! Here! (Driver trying to push him into chair) You're responsible. (In chair.) I'll have you arrested. (Clinging to Driver's coat tail as he tries to get away to door R.) Here, come back. (Choking with rage.)
Driver (first wrenching away coat from Holmes' grasp; at door down R.). I cawn't stay around 'ere, you know! Some one'll be pinching my cab.
(Exit Driver R.)
Holmes (screaming after him). Then bring your cab in here. I want (Lapses into groans and remonstrances.) Why didn't somebody stop him? These cabmen! What did he bring me in here for? I know where I am, it's a conspiracy. I won't stay in this place. If I ever get out of here alive (Etc.)
Watson (steps quickly to door R., speaking off). Parsons—take that man's number. (Quickly to old gent.) Now, sir, if you'll sit quiet
