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THE FAMILY ALBUM
55

dress on the chimney. Once he went down to Coney Island and got on the merry-go-round and left his shoes with the ticket taker. When he called any of our neighbors he would leave his shoes in their vestibule, and he got mad if they weren't shined when he said good-bye to come home.

His habits were so single that it surprised everybody when he got married to a widow with four children. That's her on this page with those seven little boys and girls. All hers. You know you've got to marry a widow to find out just how many children she really has got, because all widows seem to think that children should be subtracted and not seen.

When Alex discovered that he had married one of those University Extension families, he got mad and claimed the widow had mobbed him instead of married him. All the kids went on their honeymoon with Alex and his new bride, who was new to him.

This was the first time that Alex had ever taken out a road show that was so big you needed an advance agent. When he got to towns he seemed surprised that there wasn't any billing up on the fences.