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THE QUEER SIDE OF THINGS.
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then another picture of the same island seemed to present itself before him. He fell to coughing and gasping violently, and grew purple in the face.

"Oh, dear—what a horrible atmosphere!" he exclaimed. "I can't breathe! Whatever is the matter? What a dreadful pressure of elbows there is all round me; and how the ground moves about under one's feet as if there were an earthquake!"


"Nearly torn to pieces."

"It isn't an earthquake," explained James; "it is merely that part of the population which, being weaker, has got trodden under foot—there being insufficient standing-room on the island for all. The stratum of those trodden under foot is about 15ft. deep by this time; and you may perceive that fresh numbers are continually falling from pressure and suffocation, there being, of course, insufficient air for all.

"But, just consider!—the birth-rate is always steadily on the increase, and the population is more jubilant than ever. It is a most happy island; and all the other nations are mad with envy."

"Here! Help! I don't like this!" screamed William. "I'm being whirled away by the crowd, and nearly torn to pieces! Why are they all rushing so? What's the matter?"

"Oh, they have only caught sight of a scrap of food," said James. "You see, the island can neither produce nor import anything approaching a sufficiency of food for the population, so everyone is chronically ravenous. But this by no means discounts the jubilation at the magnificent birth-rate. Here, give me your hand, and let me help you up to this place of comparative safety, on the roof of this cathedral, where the pressure of the crowd is less great. That's all right."

"What is the matter with that throng over there? Why do they give evidence of such wild indignation?"


"He has decided to emigrate."

"It is a meeting of working-men, convened to express indignation at a suggestion lately made that some of them should emigrate in search of the employment and subsistence which they cannot find here. If they can get hold of the author of the heartless suggestion, they will tear him in pieces. He has had the cynical effrontery to propose that they shall proceed across the ocean, and settle on a fertile tract of country where every one of them would have room, pure air, and plenty of food! As he has gone there himself, they unfortunately cannot get at him to rend him limb from limb."

"And who is this young man over whom so many people are weeping, and who is evidently the victim of some terrible misfortune?"

"Oh! why, he is a very extraordinary person, with a strangely warped mind; in fact, the majority of the population look upon him as insane. He has actually decided to emigrate to that country across the ocean, and get a breath of fresh air and sufficient meals. He is looked upon as the victim of pernicious machinations, and sincerely pitied. See, he is pushing toward the sea-shore, and making his way over the bodies of those who have been squeezed out at the edge of the