The Hen-peck'd husband, or, Easy John/The Hen-peck'd husband, or, Easy John

The HEN-PECK'D HUSBAND.

YOUNG men and wives I pray attend,
while I relate my ditty,
A wife I have, I do declare,
ſhe's neither handſome, good-natur'd, nor witty.

For better for worſe I took my wife,
all joys of life with me miſcarry'd,
I oft-times wiſh'd, but wiſh'd in vain,
that to her I had ne'er been marry'd.

On Mondy morning, ere it is light,
like a ⟨horſe⟩ then I do labour
And when that I come home at night,
madam's goſſiping with each neighbour.

The fire is out, the bed's unmade,
on her coming home I'm oblig'd to tarry,
And when ſhe does, theſe words ſhe ſays,
I'll make you rue you e’er did marry.

I am your wife, your lawful wife,
to maintain me you muſt endeavour.
I call her jewel, dear, and wife,
but all theſe loving words won't pleaſe'er.

Then with a ſtool ſhe combs my ears,
my coat to the pawnbroker carries,
I oft-times wiſh, and wiſh in vain,
that I had ne'er been marry'd.

On Sunday morning ſhe does begin,
as ſoon as e'er her eyes are open,
Come riſe up John, and fetch ſome gin,
dear me, I think you're quite provoking.

Your ſhitren clouts I waſh and dry,
rock the cradle, and tend the fire,
The chamber-pot then at me does fly,
crying, You dog, then take your hire.

I've got the cholic, fetch more gin in,
whilſt I’m gone then comes young Harry;
My horns to complete is the next thing,
if this is wedlock, then who would marry?

Then I hurry'd back with the gin,
thinking to gain my dear wife's favour,
She calls me her contented buck,
and bids me drink to my neighbour.

Then from my ſight, ſhe ſays, begone;
the Devil take both her and Harry,
It would be well for Easy John,
believe me, I never more would marry.