An Indian Study of Love and Death/The Communion of the Soul with the Beloved
The Communion of the Soul with
the Beloved
The Communion of the Soul with
the Beloved
The Soul:
…Long silence. Silence and aloneness. Yet am I sure that I am not cast but into the abyss where he is not! … All is so quiet. The lamps before the altar burn like distant stars. Out in the forest, the dead leaves fall from the winter boughs. The sea breaks, grey and tideless, on the long, curving shore. Only time flies, urging me ever further onward, from the hallowed moment. Fain would time make the place of parting into a shrine of memory. Fain would let die the last tones of his voice within my ear, the look of his eyes, his touch upon my head …
But I will not be carried! Time it is that shall be conquered. Memory shall not creep into the heart, to take the place of love. All must give way, and I again walk the roadway of life in that same thought I should have known, had he not left me …
O Thou Ineffable Sweetness, wherein I was wont to see the face of my Beloved, rise Thou once more within my heart, that I may find him whom my soul seeks!
… But what is this calling-in of sense that visits me? Like ore drawn to a magnet, I sink deeper and deeper into some other state. Deeper and deeper, darker and darker it grows … All is still … Silence is His name …
I feel that here is the world of eternity. All is changeless, stirless, full of steadfastness. Here, earth is seen to be indeed a dream. Where, then, is this world?
Answer:
This world also is within the soul.
The Soul:
A deep satisfaction makes itself felt within me, by which I know that I must be at last in the presence of the Beloved. Yet do I not hear. Yet do I not see.
Answer:
Nay, listen! Soon will the silence become audible. Look! for the darkness is light invisible. Thou art on the threshold of revelation. Make thyself ready in great stillness.
There is quiet. In the heart, veil after veil falls. Till at last there is a great darkness. A shoreless sea of darkness. And a voice is heard, very slow and soft, as it were a throbbing of the dark:
Om! Hari Om! Infinite Oneness!
Thou art He! Thou art He!
Stirless ocean of bliss! All-containing fulness! Universal energy!
Thou art He! Thou art He!
Secret of all wisdom! Soul of all knowledge!
Eternal within eternity!
Om! Hari Om! Thou art He!
And the soul swoons with excess of sweetness, and in that swoon she is found by the Beloved, and awakens at His feet …
The Soul, speaking after long silence:
Ah! At last see I Thy face, radiant in glory. Withdraw not Thyself again from me, I beseech Thee.
The voice of the Beloved, heard within
the Soul:
Come, then, little one! Let us arise, and walk with the dawn upon the mountain tops. Let us pace beneath the forest-trees at sunset, and commune.
Here, where all is oneness, is long speech, long sight, impossible. Such separateness, such manifoldness, cannot even be imagined.
The Soul:
Lo, these many days have I sought Thee, mourning, and even now know I not how Thou camest unto me!
The Beloved:
Nay, foolish one! Never was I absent from thee. Here in my heart’s heart I bear thee ever, one with myself. Nay more, that knowledge unknown, that love unloved within, is the power whereby I centre myself on God, and all my being is praise.
Only thy need recalled me to the without, and broke my song …
The Soul:
How Thy face shines! How bright is the halo above Thy brow!
The Beloved:
It is the shining of God through the self-life. To me, thou art set in the self-same light.
The Soul:
And behind Thee, I see a great light reaching upwards, as if it would focus from above in Thee.
The Beloved:
The focus thou seest is in thine own great love. For here, and no other where, is thy ladder of light, to reach to God. Deny not thy love. Know only that separation is a dream, parting is but on the surface. Thou art in me, and I in thee.
The Soul:
Glorious art Thou unto me, O my Beloved! And yet most terrible. The strength of Thy praise scorches through all my being. Time conquers again. I am being withdrawn from Thee.
The Beloved:
Nay, each of us for the other is passing into the within. Hard upon thee weigh the superstitions of earth. Here, on the shores of Oneness, time is without power. This closeness of thy vision abideth for ever. Itself yieldeth but to a deeper possession, a more real union. Thou shalt find me ever in the presence of God. Thou art ever in mine own heart.
For thou art evermore one-d. Evermore. Evermore.
And the soul, after long sleep, arose and went about the ways of earth. And ever it knew a growing peace. For oft-times visions bring the truth, though at the first men say they do but dream.