Ballads of Battle/My Rifle: Some Maxims of Sergeant J. Callary
SERGEANT J. CALLARY
MY RIFLE
SOME MAXIMS OF SERGEANT J. CALLARY
To the humour, and the good humour, of the genial sergeant I owe it that the period of my early drilling, which might thinkably have been a time of deadly dullness, afforded me much entertainment, as well as not a little valuable instruction. The sergeant was always at his best in dilating upon the virtues of the rifle, and the necessity for treating it with respect.
I'm the Soldier's surest friend:
I will neither break nor bend.
I will neither break nor bend.
Straight and sterling, tried and true;
You keep me and I'll keep you.
You keep me and I'll keep you.
Bolt and barrel, butt and band;
Caress me with a careful hand.
Caress me with a careful hand.
Stock and swivel, sling and sight;
Rub me down, and keep me right.
Rub me down, and keep me right.
Striker, trigger, cocking-piece;
Give 'em all some elbow-grease.
Give 'em all some elbow-grease.
An image should appear at this position in the text. If you are able to provide it, see Wikisource:Image guidelines and Help:Adding images for guidance. |
Clean me clean, and oil me well;
I'll kill your man and never tell.
I'll kill your man and never tell.
Leave me dirty, oil me ill;
You're the chap I'm going to kill.
You're the chap I'm going to kill.
Leave me lying all awry:
You're the feller's going to die.
You're the feller's going to die.
Daily do but pull me through;
I will do the same for you.
I will do the same for you.
Only use a "two by four "—
Nothing less, and nothing more.
Nothing less, and nothing more.
"Pull-through" rag will do the trick;
A shirt or sock is going to stick!
A shirt or sock is going to stick!
And keep your bottle full of ile―
Remember the Virgins' parabile!
Remember the Virgins' parabile!
Handle me with care, I beg,
I'm not so stout as old Mons Meg!
I'm not so stout as old Mons Meg!
Do not pitch me on the ground—
To break me, a hammer can be found!
To break me, a hammer can be found!
The soldier doesn't clean his rifle
Has listed with intent to trifle.
Has listed with intent to trifle.
The chap who doesn't clean his gun
Is sorriest soldier 'neath the sun.
Is sorriest soldier 'neath the sun.
I'm the Soldier's surest friend:
I will neither break nor bend.
I will neither break nor bend.
Straight and sterling, tried and true—
You keep me and I'll keep you.
You keep me and I'll keep you.