25738Elemoont — Chapter 20Andrei Lubensky

in which the Elemoont and the Tiger–Cat find that they get not into a taxi but they get into a mess.

The spaceship–taxi raced through the spaces of The Cylindrical Universe put into functioning by the Tiger–Cat perfectly right and absolutely cylindrical thought that, as we remember, was ‘Forward!’ The Elemoont looked at the big screen above the control desk and saw that the spaces of the Cylindrical Universe are also were cylindrical. It seemed to the Elemoont that they flew along some endless pipe. Is there the end of such motion? Probably not. Endless pipes never come to the end. "It's like in a pipe," pondered the Elemoont. The Elemoont's reflection confused the Cat who persistently was thinking the perfectly right and absolutely cylindrical thought ‘Forward!’ "What a pipe yet?" asked the Cat

"It's of a chimney or steam–heating pipes," answered the Elemoont, "Most likely it's a chimney which filled with soot."

"Soot?" was surprised the Cat.

"Yes, soot has a black color. It is dark here like in a chimney and I thought…"

Here a little flame flashed and burnt out instantly on the screen. In a few seconds, it flashed again and swung as if the wind started to blow. "Where is any wind here from?" thought the Elemoont and immediately received the Cat's thought in a reply, "When Mr. Red bows and waved with his top hat a high cylindrical wind is blowing here." The flicker burnt out and flashed again. "The Hare make a camp–fire," said the Cat, "It is not easily to set a pile of cosmic rubbish on fire! Possibly, his matches grow dump."

"We must fly up to him nearer and be ready when smoke belches," remarked the Elemoont, "In that smoke we can imperceptibly leave the Cylindrical Universe."

"What do you say of it? They want to leave our Cylindrical universe!" suddenly was heard a loud raucous voice. The cat and the Elemoont started from surprise. The Cat even stopped to think 'Forward', and instead of it, he had thought ‘Back!’ The spaceship sharply braked and somersaulted in the cylindrical space. "More carefully, you," yelled the raucous voice.

"Who is yelling so raucously?" asked the Elemoont who did not fall from his seat only because he had the time to catch his seat with his long trunk.

"I don't understand!" said the Cat, who also did not fall because he had the time to catch his seat with his tail and all four pads, "But I don't like that voice!"

"If you don't like my voice, you may not listen to it!" took offense the Voice, "Maybe I catch cold and became such hoarse!"

At last, the spaceship had stopped to somersault. The Cat and the Elemoont turned. There was nobody behind them. "You see in the wrong direction," said the Voice, "Look at the control panel!"

The Elemoont looked at the control panel and it was seemed to him that one of little electric light bulbs maliciously gave a wink at him, "I'm a Big Cylindrical Computer. I'm driving this spaceship," informed the Voice.

"And I supposed that it's me is driving the spaceship," remarked the Cat, "I thought the perfectly right and perfectly cylindrical thought ‘Forward!’ and the ship flew forward, and when I thought ‘Back!’ it flew back…"

"It's because I was distracted for philosophical reflections," reported the computer, "I reflected that in outer space it is all the same you fly forward or you fly back, or you idle away your time; it's all the same!"

"All the same?" was astonished the Elemoont.

"Absolutely all the same!" confirmed the Voice and suddenly sang, "Yoh–ho–ho and a bottle of…yogurt!"

"It seems to me I had heard this song anywhere," whispered the Elemoont.

"Of course!" answered the Cat, "Anybody who was in the cylindrical spaciousness had heard this song!"

"However I was not…" began the Elemoont, but the Cat interrupted him, "It's unimportant! Somebody could tell you about it, your grandmother, for instance. It is the song…"

"It is the song of cosmic–cylindrical pirates!" caught up the raucous voice. At that very instant, the door flew open and real cosmic–cylindrical pirates barged into the room.

One of them held the Hare by his ears. "See! They have caught him!" muttered the Elemoont.

"They have caught and us also," remarked the Cat, "It turned out we got in not a taxi," guessed the Elemoont.

"We had got into a mess," agreed the Cat.

Pirates spitefully laughed and sang discordantly,

"We're wanderers of Cosmos
Nevertheless, we want yogurt!
Yoh–ho–ho!
Yoh–ho–ho!
Yogurt want we!!!"

It is really too much! I have to finish this chapter.