Fortunate weaver's uprise, or, The landlady well pleased/The lady's diary

THE LADY'S DIARY.

LECTUR'D by Pa and Ma o'er night,
Monday, at ten, quite vex’d and jealous,
Resolv'd in future to be right,
and never listen to the fellows!
Stitch'd half a wristband, read the text,
receiv’d a note from Mrs. Rackit:
I hate the woman, she sat next
all church-time, to sweet Captain Clackit.

Tuesday got scolded, did not care,
the toast was cold, 'twas past eleven,
I dreamt the Captain, through the air,
on Cupid’s wings bore me to heav’n!
Pouted and din’d, dress'd, look’d divine,
made an excuse, got Ma to back it;
Went to the play, what joy was mine!
talk’d loud & laugh’d with Captain Clackit.

Wednesday came down, no lark so gay!
the girl's quite alter’d, said my Mother;
Cry'd Dad, I recollect the day
when, Dearie, thou wert such another.
Danc’d, drew a landscape, skimn’d a play,
in the paper read that widow Flackit
To Gretna-Green had run away,
the forward minx! with Captain Ciackit.

Thursday fell sick; poor foul, she’ll die;
five doctors came with length’ned faces;
Each felt my pulse; ah, me! cry'd I,
are these my promis’d loves and graces!
Friday grew worse; cry'd Ma, in pain,
our day was fair, heav’n do not black it;
Where’s your complaint, love? In my brain,
what shall I give you? Captain Clackit.

Early next morn a nostrum came
worth all their cordials, balms, and spices,
A letter; I had been to blame;
the Captain’s truth brought on a crisis:
Sunday, for fear of more delays,
of a few clothes I made a packet,
And Monday morn stept in a chaise,
and ran away with Captain Clackit.