Love's Labour's Lost (1925) Yale/Text/Act V
ACT FIFTH
Scene One
[The King of Navarre's Park]
Enter the Pedant [Holofernes], the Curate [Nathaniel], and Dull.
Hol. Satis quod sufficit.
Nath. I praise God for you, sir: your reasons
at dinner have been sharp and sententious;
pleasant without scurrility, witty without affec- 4
tion, audacious without impudency, learned
without opinion, and strange without heresy. I
did converse this quondam day with a com-
panion of the king's, who is intituled, nomi- 8
nated, or called, Don Adriano de Armado.
Hol. Novi hominem tanquam te: his humour
is lofty, his discourse peremptory, his tongue
filed, his eye ambitious, his gait majestical, and 2
his general behaviour vain, ridiculous, and
thrasonical. He is too picked, too spruce, too
affected, too odd, as it were, too peregrinate, as
I may call it. 16
Nath. A most singular and choice epithet.
Hol. He draweth out the thread of his verbo-
sity finer than the staple of his argument. I
abhor such fanatical phantasimes, such insoci- 20
able and point-devise companions; such rackers
of orthography, as to speak 'dout,' fine, when he
should say 'doubt'; 'det,' when he should pro-
nounce 'debt,'—d, e, b, t, not d, e, t: he clepeth a 24
calf, cauf; half, hauf; neighbour vocatur nebour,
neigh abbreviated ne. This is abhominable,
which he would call abominable,—it insinuateth
me of insanie: ne intelligis, domine? To 28
make frantic, lunatic.
Nath. Laus Deo bene intelligo.
Hol. Bon, bon, fort bon! Priscian a little
scratched; 'twill serve. 32
Enter Braggart [Armado], Boy [Moth, and Costard].
Nath. Videsne quis venit?
Hol. Video, et gaudeo.
Arm. [To Moth.] Chirrah!
Hol. Quare chirrah, not sirrah? 36
Arm. Men of peace, well encountered.
Hol. Most military sir, salutation.
Moth. [Aside to Costard.] They have been
at a great feast of languages, and stolen the 40
scraps.
Cost. O! they have lived long on the alms-
basket of words. I marvel thy master hath not
eaten thee for a word; for thou art not so long 44
by the head as honorificabilitudinitatibus: thou
art easier swallowed than a flap-dragon.
Moth. Peace! the peal begins.
Arm. [To Holofernes.] Monsieur, are you 48
not lettered?
Moth. Yes, yes; he teaches boys the horn-
book. What is a, b, spelt backward, with the
horn on his head? 52
Hol. Ba, pueritia, with a horn added.
Moth. Ba! most silly sheep with a horn. You
hear his learning.
Hol. Quis, quis, thou consonant? 56
Moth. The third of the five vowels, if you
repeat them; or the fifth, if I.
Hol. I will repeat them,—a, e, i,—
Moth. The sheep; the other two concludes 60
it,—o, u.
Arm. Now, by the salt wave of the Mediter-
raneum, a sweet touch, a quick venew of wit!
snip, snap, quick and home! it rejoiceth my 64
intellect: true wit!
Moth. Offered by a child to an old man;
which is wit-old.
Hol. What is the figure? what is the figure? 68
Moth. Horns.
Hol. Thou disputest like an infant; go, whip
thy gig.
Moth. Lend me your horn to make one, and 72
I will whip about your infamy circum circa. A
gig of a cuckold's horn.
Cost. An I had but one penny in the world,
thou shouldst have it to buy gingerbread. Hold, 76
there is the very remuneration I had of thy
master, thou halfpenny purse of wit, thou
pigeon-egg of discretion. O, an the heavens were
so pleased that thou wert but my bastard, what 80
a joyful father wouldst thou make me! Go to;
thou hast it ad dunghill, at the fingers' ends, as
they say.
Hol. O! I smell false Latin! dunghill for 84
unguem.
Arm. Arts-man, præambula: we will be
singled from the barbarous. Do you not educate
youth at the charge-house on the top of the 88
mountain?
Hol. Or mons, the hill.
Arm. At your sweet pleasure, for the moun-
tain. 92
Hol. I do, sans question.
Arm. Sir, it is the king's most sweet pleasure
and affection to congratulate the princess at her
pavilion in the posteriors of this day, which the 96
rude multitude call the afternoon.
Hol. The posterior of the day, most gene-
rous sir, is liable, congruent, and measurable
for the afternoon: the word is well culled, 100
chose, sweet and apt, I do assure you, sir; I do
assure.
Arm. Sir, the king is a noble gentleman, and
my familiar, I do assure ye, very good friend. 104
For what is inward between us, let it pass: I do
beseech thee, remember thy courtesy; I beseech
thee, apparel thy head: and among other im-
portunate and most serious designs, and of great 108
import indeed, too, but let that pass: for I must
tell thee, it will please his Grace, by the world,
sometime to lean upon my poor shoulder, and
with his royal finger, thus dally with my excre- 112
ment, with my mustachio: but, sweet heart, let
that pass. By the world, I recount no fable:
some certain special honours it pleaseth his
greatness to impart to Armado, a soldier, a man 116
of travel, that hath seen the world: but let that
pass. The very all of all is, but, sweet heart, I do
implore secrecy, that the king would have me
present the princess, sweet chuck, with some 120
delightful ostentation, or show, or pageant, or
antick, or fire-work. Now, understanding that
the curate and your sweet self are good at such
eruptions and sudden breaking out of mirth, as 124
it were, I have acquainted you withal, to the end
to crave your assistance.
Hol. Sir, you shall present before her the
Nine Worthies. Sir Nathaniel, as concerning 128
some entertainment of time, some show in the
posterior of this day, to be rendered by our
assistants, the king's command, and this
most gallant, illustrate, and learned gentleman, 132
before the princess; I say, none so fit as to pre-
sent the Nine Worthies.
Nath. Where will you find men worthy
enough to present them? 136
Hol. Joshua, yourself; myself, or this gallant
gentleman, Judas Maccabæus; this swain, be-
cause of his great limb, or joint, shall pass
Pompey the Great; the page, Hercules,— 140
Arm. Pardon, sir; error: he is not quantity
enough for that Worthy's thumb: he is not so
big as the end of his club.
Hol. Shall I have audience? he shall present 144
Hercules in minority: his enter and exit shall be
strangling a snake; and I will have an apology
for that purpose.
Moth. An excellent device! so, if any of 148
the audience hiss, you may cry, 'Well done,
Hercules! now thou crushest the snake!' that is
the way to make an offence gracious, though
few have the grace to do it. 152
Arm. For the rest of the Worthies?—
Hol. I will play three myself.
Moth. Thrice-worthy gentleman!
Arm. Shall I tell you a thing? 156
Hol. We attend.
Arm. We will have, if this fadge not, an
antick. I beseech you, follow.
Hol. Via, goodman Dull! thou hast spoken 160
no word all this while.
Dull. Nor understood none neither, sir.
Hol. Allons! we will employ thee.
Dull. I'll make one in a dance, or so; or I 164
will play on the tabor to the Worthies, and let them
dance the hay.
Hol. Most dull, honest Dull, to our sport,
away! Exeunt.
Scene Two
[The same. Before the Princess's Pavilion]
Enter the Ladies [i.e. Princess, Katharine, Rosaline, and Maria].
Prin. Sweet hearts, we shall be rich ere we depart,
If fairings come thus plentifully in.
A lady wall'd about with diamonds!
Look you what I have from the loving king. 4
Ros. Madam, came nothing else along with that?
Prin. Nothing but this! yes, as much love in rime
As would be cramm'd up in a sheet of paper,
Writ o' both sides the leaf, margent and all, 8
That he was fain to seal on Cupid's name.
Ros. That was the way to make his godhead wax;
For he hath been five thousand year a boy.
Kath. Ay, and a shrewd unhappy gallows too. 12
Ros. You'll ne'er be friends with him: a' kill'd your sister.
Kath. He made her melancholy, sad, and heavy;
And so she died: had she been light, like you,
Of such a merry, nimble, stirring spirit, 16
She might ha' been a grandam ere she died;
And so may you, for a light heart lives long.
Ros. What's your dark meaning, mouse, of this light word?
Kath. A light condition in a beauty dark. 20
Ros. We need more light to find your meaning out.
Kath. You'll mar the light by taking it in snuff;
Therefore, I'll darkly end the argument.
Ros. Look, what you do, you do it still i' the dark. 24
Kath. So do not you, for you are a light wench.
Ros. Indeed I weigh not you, and therefore light.
Kath. You weigh me not. O! that's you care not for me.
Ros. Great reason; for, 'past cure is still past care.' 28
Prin. Well bandied both; a set of wit well play'd.
But Rosaline, you have a favour too:
Who sent it? and what is it?
Ros. I would you knew:
An if my face were but as fair as yours, 32
My favour were as great; be witness this.
Nay, I have verses too, I thank Berowne:
The numbers true; and, were the numb'ring too,
I were the fairest goddess on the ground: 36
I am compar'd to twenty thousand fairs.
O, he hath drawn my picture in his letter!
Prin. Anything like?
Ros. Much in the letters, nothing in the praise. 40
Prin. Beauteous as ink; a good conclusion.
Kath. Fair as a text B in a copy-book.
Ros. 'Ware pencils, ho! let me not die your debtor,
My red dominical, my golden letter: 44
O, that your face were not so full of O's!
Prin. A pox of that jest! and I beshrew all shrows!
But, Katharine, what was sent to you from fair Dumaine?
Kath. Madam, this glove.
Prin. Did he not send you twain? 48
Kath. Yes, madam; and moreover,
Some thousand verses of a faithful lover:
A huge translation of hypocrisy,
Vilely compil'd, profound simplicity.52
Mar. This, and these pearls to me sent Longaville:
The letter is too long by half a mile.
Prin. I think no less. Dost thou not wish in heart
The chain were longer and the letter short? 56
Mar. Ay, or I would these hands might never part.
Prin. We are wise girls to mock our lovers so.
Ros. They are worse fools to purchase mocking so.
That same Berowne I'll torture ere I go. 60
O that I knew he were but in by the week!
How I would make him fawn, and beg, and seek,
And wait the season, and observe the times,
And spend his prodigal wits in bootless rimes, 64
And shape his service wholly to my hests,
And make him proud to make me proud that jests!
So perttaunt-like would I o'ersway his state
That he should be my fool, and I his fate. 68
Prin. None are so surely caught, when they are catch'd,
As wit turn'd fool: folly, in wisdom hatch'd,
Hath wisdom's warrant and the help of school
And wit's own grace to grace a learned fool. 72
Ros. The blood of youth burns not with such excess
As gravity’s revolt to wantonness.
Mar. Folly in fools bears not so strong a note
As foolery in the wise, when wit doth dote; 76
Since all the power thereof it doth apply
To prove, by wit, worth in simplicity.
Enter Boyet.
Prin. Here comes Boyet, and mirth is in his face.
Boyet. O, I am stabb'd with laughter! Where's her Grace? 80
Prin. Thy news, Boyet?
Boyet. Prepare, madam, prepare!—
Arm, wenches, arm! encounters mounted are
Against your peace: Love doth approach disguis'd,
Armed in arguments; you'll be surpris'd: 84
Muster your wits; stand in your own defence;
Or hide your heads like cowards, and fly hence.
Prin. Saint Denis to Saint Cupid! What are they
That charge their breath against us? say, scout, say. 88
Boyet. Under the cool shade of a sycamore
I thought to close mine eyes some half an hour,
When, lo! to interrupt my purpos'd rest,
Toward that shade I might behold addrest 92
The king and his companions: warily
I stole into a neighbour thicket by,
And overheard what you shall overhear;
That, by and by, disguis'd they will be here. 96
Their herald is a pretty knavish page,
That well by heart hath conn'd his embassage:
Action and accent did they teach him there;
'Thus must thou speak, and thus thy body bear.' 100
And ever and anon they made a doubt
Presence majestical would put him out;
'For,' quoth the king, 'an angel shalt thou see;
Yet fear not thou, but speak audaciously.' 104
The boy replied, 'An angel is not evil;
I should have fear'd her had she been a devil.'
With that all laugh'd and clapp'd him on the shoulder,
Making the bold wag by their praises bolder. 108
One rubb'd his elbow thus, and fleer'd, and swore
A better speech was never spoke before;
Another, with his finger and his thumb,
Cry'd 'Via! we will do 't, come what will come'; 112
The third he caper'd and cried, 'All goes well';
The fourth turn'd on the toe, and down he fell.
With that, they all did tumble on the ground,
With such a zealous laughter, so profound, 116
That in this spleen ridiculous appears,
To check their folly, passion's solemn tears.
Prin. But what, but what? come they to visit us?
Boyet. They do, they do; and are apparell'd thus, 120
Like Muscovites or Russians, as I guess.
Their purpose is to parle, to court and dance;
And every one his love-feat will advance
Unto his several mistress, which they'll know 124
By favours several which they did bestow.
Prin. And will they so? the gallaats shall be task'd:
For, ladies, we will every one be mask'd,
And not a man of them shall have the grace, 128
Despite of suit, to see a lady's face.
Hold, Rosaline, this favour thou shalt wear,
And then the king will court thee for his dear:
Hold, take thou this, my sweet, and give me thine, 132
So shall Berowne take me for Rosaline,
And change you favours too; so shall your loves
Woo contrary, deceiv'd by these removes.
Ros. Come on, then; wear the favours most in sight. 136
Kath. But in this changing what is your intent?
Prin. The effect of my intent is, to cross theirs:
They do it but in mockery merriment;
And mock for mock is only my intent. 140
Their several counsels they unbosom shall
To loves mistook and so be mock'd withal
Upon the next occasion that we meet,
With visages display'd, to talk and greet. 144
Ros. But shall we dance, if they desire us to 't?
Prin. No, to the death, we will not move a foot:
Nor to their penn'd speech render we no grace;
But while 'tis spoke each turn away her face. 148
Boyet. Why, that contempt will kill the speaker's heart,
And quite divorce his memory from his part.
Prin. Therefore I do it; and I make no doubt,
The rest will ne'er come in, if he be out. 152
There's no such sport as sport by sport o'erthrown,
To make theirs ours and ours none but our own:
So shall we stay, mocking intended game,
And they, well mock'd, depart away with shame. 156
Boyet. The trumpet sounds: be mask'd; the maskers come.
Enter Blackamoors with music; the Boy [Moth] with a speech, and the rest of the Lords disguised.
Moth. 'All hail, the richest beauties on the earth!'
Boyet. Beauties no richer than rich taffeta.
Moth. 'A holy parcel of the fairest dames, 160
The Ladies turn their backs to him.
That ever turn'd their—backs—to mortal views!'
Ber. 'Their eyes,' villain, 'their eyes.'
Moth. ‘That ever turn'd their eyes to mortal views! Out—' 164
Boyet. True; 'out,' indeed.
Moth. 'Out of your favours, heavenly spirits, vouchsafe
Not to behold'—
Ber. 'Once to behold,' rogue. 168
Moth. 'Once to behold with your sun-beamed eyes,
—with your sun-beamed eyes'—
Boyet. They will not answer to that epithet;
You were best call it 'daughter-beamed eyes.' 172
Moth. They do not mark me, and that brings me out.
Ber. Is this your perfectness? be gone, you rogue!
Ros. What would these strangers? know their minds, Boyet:
If they do speak our language, 'tis our will 176
That some plain man recount their purposes:
Know what they would.
Boyet. What would you with the princess?
Ber. Nothing but peace and gentle visitation. 180
Ros. What would they, say they?
Boyet. Nothing but peace and gentle visitation.
Ros. Why, that they have; and bid them so be gone.
Boyet. She says, you have it, and you may be gone. 184
King. Say to her, we have measur'd many miles,
To tread a measure with her on this grass.
Boyet. They say that they have measur'd many a mile,
To tread a measure with you on this grass. 188
Ros. It is not so. Ask them how many inches
Is in one mile: if they have measur'd many,
The measure then of one is easily told.
Boyet. If to come hither you have measur'd miles, 192
And many miles, the princess bids you tell
How many inches do fill up one mile.
Ber. Tell her we measure them by weary steps.
Boyet. She hears herself.
Ros. How many weary steps, 196
Of many weary miles you have o'ergone,
Are number'd in the travel of one mile?
Ber. We number nothing that we spend for you:
Our duty is so rich, so infinite, 200
That we may do it still without accompt.
Vouchsafe to show the sunshine of your face,
That we, like savages, may worship it.
Ros. My face is but a moon, and clouded too. 204
King. Blessed are clouds, to do as such clouds do!
Vouchsafe, bright moon, and these thy stars, to shine,
Those clouds remov'd, upon our wat'ry eyne.
Ros. O vain petitioner! beg a greater matter; 208
Thou now requests but moonshine in the water.
King. Then, in our measure vouchsafe but one change.
Thou bid'st me beg; this begging is not strange.
Ros. Play, music, then! Nay, you must do it soon. 212
[Music plays.]
Not yet! no dance! thus change I like the moon.
King. Will you not dance? How come you thus estrang'd?
Ros. You took the moon at full, but now she's chang'd.
King. Yet still she is the moon, and I the man. 216
The music plays; vouchsafe some motion to it.
Ros. Our ears vouchsafe it.
King. But your legs should do it.
Ros. Since you are strangers, and come here by chance,
We'll not be nice: take hands: we will not dance. 220
King. Why take we hands then?
Ros. Only to part friends.
Curtsy, sweet hearts; and so the measure ends.
King. More measure of this measure: be not nice.
Ros. We can afford no more at such a price. 224
King. Prize you yourselves. What buys your company?
Ros. Your absence only.
King. That can never be.
Ros. Then cannot we be bought: and so, adieu;
Twice to your visor, and half once to you! 228
King. If you deny to dance, let's hold more chat.
Ros. In private, then.
King. I am best pleas'd with that.
Ber. White-handed mistress, one sweet word with thee.
Prin. Honey, and milk, and sugar; there are three. 232
Ber. Nay then, two treys, an if you grow so nice,
Metheglin, wort, and malmsey: well run, dice!
There's half a dozen sweets.
Prin. Seventh sweet, adieu:
Since you can cog, I'll play no more with you. 236
Ber. One word in secret.
Prin. Let it not be sweet.
Ber. Thou griev'st my gall.
Prin. Gall! bitter.
Ber. Therefore meet.
Dum. Will you vouchsafe with me to change a word?
Mar. Name it.
Dum. Fair lady,—
Mar. Say you so? Fair lord! 240
Take that for your 'fair lady.'
Dum. Please it you,
As much in private, and I'll bid adieu.
Kath. What! was your vizard made without a tongue?
Long. I know the reason, lady, why you ask. 244
Kath. O for your reason; quickly, sir; I long.
Long. You have a double tongue within your mask,
And would afford my speechless vizard half.
Kath. 'Veal,' quoth the Dutchman. Is not 'veal' a calf? 248
Long. A calf, fair lady!
Kath. No, a fair lord calf.
Long. Let's part the word.
Kath. No, I'll not be your half:
Take all, and wean it: it may prove an ox.
Long. Look, how you butt yourself in these sharp mocks. 252
Will you give horns, chaste lady? do not so.
Kath. Then die a calf, before your horns do grow.
Long. One word in private with you, ere I die.
Kath. Bleat softly then; the butcher hears you cry. 256
Boyet. The tongues of mocking wenches are as keen
As is the razor's edge invisible,
Cutting a smaller hair than may be seen,
Above the sense of sense; so sensible 260
Seemeth their conference; their conceits have wings
Fleeter than arrows, bullets, wind, thought, swifter things.
Ros. Not one word more, my maids: break off, break off.
Ber. By heaven, all dry-beaten with pure scoff! 264
King. Farewell, mad wenches: you have simple wits.
Prin. Twenty adieus, my frozen Muscovits.
Are these the breed of wits so wonder'd at?
Boyet. Tapers they are, with your sweet breaths puff'd out. 268
Ros. Well-liking wits they have; gross, gross; fat, fat.
Prin. O poverty in wit, kingly-poor flout!
Will they not, think you, hang themselves to-night?
Or ever, but in vizards, show their faces? 272
This pert Berowne was out of countenance quite.
Ros. They were all in lamentable cases.
The king was weeping-ripe for a good word.
Prin. Berowne did swear himself out of all suit. 276
Mar. Dumaine was at my service, and his sword:
'No point,' quoth I: my servant straight was mute.
Kath. Lord Longaville said, I came o'er his heart;
And trow you what he call'd me?
Prin. Qualm, perhaps. 280
Kath. Yes, in good faith.
Prin. Go, sickness as thou art!
Ros. Well, better wits have worn plain statute-caps.
But will you hear? the king is my love sworn.
Prin. And quick Berowne hath plighted faith to me. 284
Kath. And Longaville was for my service born.
Mar. Dumaine is mine, as sure as bark on tree.
Boyet. Madam, and pretty mistresses, give ear:
Immediately they will again be here 288
In their own shapes; for it can never be
They will digest this harsh indignity.
Prin. Will they return?
Boyet. They will, they will, God knows;
And leap for joy, though they are lame with blows: 292
Therefore change favours; and, when they repair,
Blow like sweet roses in this summer air.
Prin. How blow? how blow? speak to be understood.
Boyet. Fair ladies, mask'd, are roses in their bud: 296
Dismask'd, their damask sweet commixture shown,
Are angels vailing clouds, or roses blown.
Prin. Avaunt, perplexity! What shall we do,
If they return in their own shapes to woo? 300
Ros. Good madam, if by me you'll be advis'd,
Let's mock them still, as well known as disguis'd.
Let us complain to them what fools were here,
Disguis'd like Muscovites, in shapeless gear; 304
And wonder what they were, and to what end
Their shallow shows and prologue vilely penn'd,
And their rough carriage so ridiculous,
Should be presented at our tent to us. 308
Boyet. Ladies, withdraw: the gallants are at hand.
Prin. Whip to your tents, as roes runs o'er land.
Enter the King and the rest [of the Lords].
King. Fair sir, God save you! Where is the princess?
Boyet. Gone to her tent. Please it your majesty, 312
Command me any service to her thither?
King. That she vouchsafe me audience for one word.
Boyet. I will; and so will she, I know, my lord.
Ber. This fellow pecks up wit, as pigeons pease, 316
And utters it again when God doth please:
He is wit's pedlar, and retails his wares
At wakes and wassails, meetings, markets, fairs;
And we that sell by gross, the Lord doth know, 320
Have not the grace to grace it with such show.
This gallant pins the wenches on his sleeve;
Had he been Adam, he had tempted Eve:
He can carve too, and lisp: why, this is he 324
That kiss'd his hand away in courtesy.
This is the ape of form, monsieur the nice,
That, when he plays at tables, chides the dice
In honourable terms: nay, he can sing 328
A mean most meanly, and in ushering
Mend him who can: the ladies call him sweet;
The stairs, as he treads on them, kiss his feet.
This is the flower that smiles on every one, 332
To show his teeth as white as whales-bone;
And consciences, that will not die in debt,
Pay him the due of honey-tongu'd Boyet.
King. A blister on his sweet tongue, with my heart, 336
That put Armado's page out of his part!
Enter the Ladies [with Boyet].
Ber. See where it comes! Behaviour, what wert thou,
Till this man show'd thee? and what art thou now?
King. All hail, sweet madam, and fair time of day! 340
Prin, 'Fair,' in 'all hail,' is foul, as I conceive.
King. Construe my speeches better, if you may.
Prin. Then wish me better: I will give you leave.
King. We came to visit you, and purpose now 344
To lead you to our court: vouchsafe it then.
Prin. This field shall hold me, and so hold your vow:
Nor God, nor I, delights in perjur'd men.
King. Rebuke me not for that which you provoke: 348
The virtue of your eye must break my oath.
Prin. You nickname virtue; vice you should have spoke;
For virtue's office never breaks men's troth.
Now, by my maiden honour, yet as pure 352
As the unsullied lily, I protest,
A world of torments though I should endure,
I would not yield to be your house's guest;
So much I hate a breaking cause to be 356
Of heavenly oaths, vow'd with integrity.
King. O, you have liv'd in desolation here,
Unseen, unvisited, much to our shame.
Prin. Not so, my lord; it is not so, I swear; 360
We have had pastimes here and pleasant game.
A mess of Russians left us but of late.
King. How, madam! Russians?
Prin. Ay, in truth, my lord;
Trim gallants, full of courtship and of state. 364
Ros. Madam, speak true. It is not so, my lord:
My lady, to the manner of the days,
In courtesy gives undeserving praise.
We four, indeed, confronted were with four 368
In Russian habit: here they stay'd an hour,
And talk'd apace; and in that hour, my lord,
They did not bless us with one happy word.
I dare not call them fools; but this I think, 372
When they are thirsty, fools would fain have drink.
Ber. This jest is dry to me. Gentle sweet,
Your wit makes wise things foolish: when we greet,
With eyes best seeing, heaven's fiery eye, 376
By light we lose light: your capacity
Is of that nature that to your huge store
Wise things seem foolish and rich things but poor.
Ros. This proves you wise and rich, for in my eye— 380
Ber. I am a fool, and full of poverty.
Ros. But that you take what doth to you belong,
It were a fault to snatch words from my tongue.
Ber. O, I am yours, and all that I possess. 384
Ros. All the fool mine?
Ber. I cannot give you less.
Ros. Which of the vizards was it that you wore?
Ber. Where? when? what vizard? why demand you this?
Ros. There, then, that vizard; that superfluous case 388
That hid the worse, and show'd the better face.
King. We were descried: they'll mock us now downright.
Dum. Let us confess, and turn it to a jest.
Prin. Amaz'd, my lord? Why looks your highness sad? 392
Ros. Help! hold his brows! he'll sound. Why look you pale?
Sea-sick, I think, coming from Muscovy.
Ber. Thus pour the stars down plagues for perjury.
Can any face of brass hold longer out?— 396
Here stand I, lady; dart thy skill at me;
Bruise me with scorn, confound me with a flout;
Thrust thy sharp wit quite through my ignorance;
Cut me to pieces with thy keen conceit; 400
And I will wish thee never more to dance,
Nor never more in Russian habit wait.
O, never will I trust to speeches penn'd,
Nor to the motion of a schoolboy's tongue, 404
Nor never come in vizard to my friend,
Nor woo in rime, like a blind harper's song.
Taffeta phrases, silken terms precise,
Three-pil'd hyperboles, spruce affectation, 408
Figures pedantical; these summer flies
Have blown me full of maggot ostentation:
I do forswear them; and I here protest,
By this white glove,—how white the hand, God knows,— 412
Henceforth my wooing mind shall be express'd
In russet yeas and honest kersey noes:
And, to begin, wench,—so God help me, la!—
My love to thee is sound, sans crack or flaw. 416
Ros. Sans 'sans,' I pray you.
Ber. Yet I have a trick
Of the old rage: bear with me, I am sick;
I'll leave it by degrees. Soft! let us see:
Write, 'Lord have mercy on us' on those three; 420
They are infected, in their hearts it lies;
They have the plague, and caught it of your eyes:
These lords are visited; you are not free,
For the Lord's tokens on you do I see. 424
Prin. No, they are free that gave these tokens to us.
Ber. Our states are forfeit: seek not to undo us.
Ros. It is not so. For how can this be true,
That you stand forfeit, being those that sue? 428
Ber. Peace! for I will not have to do with you.
Ros. Nor shall not, if I do as I intend.
Ber. Speak for yourselves: my wit is at an end.
King. Teach us, sweet madam, for our rude transgression 432
Some fair excuse.
Prin. The fairest is confession.
Were you not here, but even now, disguis'd?
King. Madam, I was.
Prin. And were you well advis'd?
King. I was, fair madam.
Prin. When you then were here, 436
What did you whisper in your lady's ear?
King. That more than all the world I did respect her.
Prin. When she shall challenge this, you will reject her.
King. Upon mine honour, no.
Prin. Peace! peace! forbear; 440
Your oath once broke, you force not to forswear.
King. Despise me, when I break this oath of mine.
Prin. I will; and therefore keep it. Rosaline,
What did the Russian whisper in your ear? 444
Ros. Madam, he swore that he did hold me dear
As precious eyesight, and did value me
Above this world; adding thereto, moreover,
That he would wed me, or else die my lover. 448
Prin. God give thee joy of him! the noble lord
Most honourably doth uphold his word.
King. What mean you, madam? by my life, my troth,
I never swore this lady such an oath. 452
Ros. By heaven you did; and to confirm it plain,
You gave me this: but take it, sir, again.
King. My faith and this the princess I did give:
I knew her by this jewel on her sleeve. 456
Prin. Pardon me, sir, this jewel did she wear;
And Lord Berowne, I thank him, is my dear.
What, will you have me, or your pearl again?
Ber. Neither of either; I remit both twain. 460
I see the trick on 't: here was a consent,
Knowing aforehand of our merriment,
To dash it like a Christmas comedy.
Some carry-tale, some please-man, some slight zany, 464
Some mumble-news, some trencher-knight, some Dick,
That smiles his cheek in years, and knows the trick
To make my lady laugh when she's dispos'd,
Told our intents before; which once disclos'd, 468
The ladies did change favours, and then we,
Following the signs, woo'd but the sign of she.
Now, to our perjury to add more terror,
We are again forsworn, in will and error. 472
Much upon this it is: [To Boyet.] and might not you
Forestall our sport, to make us thus untrue?
Do not you know my lady's foot by the squire,
And laugh upon the apple of her eye? 476
And stand between her back, sir, and the fire,
Holding a trencher, jesting merrily?
You put our page out: go, you are allow'd;
Die when you will, a smock shall be your shroud. 480
You leer upon me, do you? there's an eye
Wounds like a leaden sword.
Boyet. Full merrily
Hath this brave manage, this career, been run.
Ber. Lo! he is tilting straight. Peace! I have done. 484
Enter Clown [i.e. Costard].
Welcome, pure wit! thou partest a fair fray.
Cost. O Lord, sir, they would know
Whether the three Worthies shall come in or no.
Ber. What, are there but three?
Cost. No, sir; but it is vara fine, 488
For every one pursents three.
Ber. And three times thrice is nine.
Cost. Not so, sir; under correction, sir, I hope, it is not so.
You cannot beg us, sir, I can assure you, sir; we know what we know:
I hope, sir, three times thrice, sir,—
Ber. Is not nine? 492
Cost. Under correction, sir, we know where-
until it doth amount.
Ber. By Jove, I always took three threes for nine.
Cost. O Lord, sir! it were pity you should get 496
your living by reckoning, sir.
Ber. How much is it?
Cost. O Lord, sir! the parties themselves, the
actors, sir, will show whereuntil it doth amount: 500
for mine own part, I am, as they say, but to par-
fect one man in one poor man, Pompion the
Great, sir.
Ber. Art thou one of the Worthies? 504
Cost. It pleased them to think me worthy of
Pompey the Great: for mine own part, I know
not the degree of the Worthy, but I am to stand
for him. 508
Ber. Go, bid them prepare.
Cost. We will turn it finely off, sir; we will take some care. Exit.
King. Berowne, they will shame us; let them not approach.
Ber. We are shame-proof, my lord; and 'tis some policy 512
To have one show worse than the king's and his company.
King. I say they shall not come.
Prin. Nay, my good lord, let me o'errule you now.
That sport best pleases that doth least know how; 516
Where zeal strives to content, and the contents
Dies in the zeal of that which it presents;
Their form confounded makes most form in mirth,
When great things labouring perish in their birth. 520
Ber. A right description of our sport, my lord.
Enter Braggart [i.e. Armado].
Arm. Anointed, I implore so much expense
of thy royal sweet breath as will utter a brace of
words. 524
delivers a paper to him.]
Prin. Doth this man serve God?
Ber. Why ask you?
Prin. A' speaks not like a man of God his making.
Arm. That is all one, my fair, sweet, honey 528
monarch; for, I protest, the schoolmaster is
exceeding fantastical; too-too vain; too-too
vain: but we will put it, as they say, to fortuna
de la guerra. I wish you the peace of mind, 532
most royal couplement! Exit.
King. Here is like to be a good presence of
Worthies. He presents Hector of Troy; the
swain, Pompey the Great; the parish curate, 536
Alexander; Armado's page, Hercules; the pe-
dant, Judas Maccabæus:
And if these four Worthies in their first show thrive,
These four will change habits and present the other five. 540
Ber. There is five in the first show.
King. You are deceived, 'tis not so.
Ber. The pedant, the braggart, the hedge-
priest, the fool, and the boy:— 544
Abate throw at novum, and the whole world again
Cannot pick out five such, take each one in his vein.
King. The ship is under sail, and here she comes amain.
Enter [Costard armed, for] Pompey.
Cost. 'I Pompey am,—'
Boyet. You lie, you are not he. 548
Cost. 'I Pompey am,—'
Boyet. With libbard's head on knee.
Ber. Well said, old mocker: I must needs be friends with thee.
Cost. 'I Pompey am, Pompey surnam'd the Big,—'
Dum. 'The Great.' 552
Cost. It is 'Great,' sir; 'Pompey surnam'd the Great;
That oft in field, with targe and shield, did make my foe to sweat:
And travelling along this coast, I here am come by chance,
And lay my arms before the legs of this sweet lass of France. 556
If your ladyship would say, 'Thanks, Pompey,' I had done.
Prin. Great thanks, great Pompey.
Cost. 'Tis not so much worth; but I hope
I was perfect. I made a little fault in 'Great.' 560
Ber. My hat to a halfpenny, Pompey proves
the best Worthy.
Enter Curate [Nathaniel] for Alexander.
Nath. 'When in the world I liv'd, I was the world's commander;
By east, west, north, and south, I spread my conquering might: 564
My scutcheon plain declares that I am Alisander,—'
Boyet. Your nose says, no, you are not; for it stands too right.
Ber. Your nose smells 'no,' in this, most tender-smelling knight.
Prin. The conqueror is dismay'd. Proceed, good Alexander. 568
Nath. 'When in the world I liv'd, I was the world's commander;—'
Boyet. Most true; 'tis right: you were so, Alisander.
Ber. Pompey the Great,—
Cost. Your servant, and Costard. 572
Ber. Take away the conqueror, take away Alisander.
Cost. [To Nathaniel.] O! sir, you have over-
thrown Alisander the conqueror! You will be
scraped out of the painted cloth for this: your 576
lion, that holds his poll-axe sitting on a close-
stool, will be given to Ajax: he will be the ninth
Worthy. A conqueror, and afeard to speak!
run away for shame, Alisander! [Nathaniel 580
retires.] There, an 't shall please you: a foolish
mild man; an honest man, look you, and soon
dashed! He is a marvellous good neighbour,
faith, and a very good bowler; but, for Alisan- 584
der,—alas, you see how 'tis,—a little o'erparted.
But there are Worthies a-coming will speak
their mind in some other sort.
Prin. Stand aside, good Pompey. 588
Enter Pedant [Holofernes] for Judas, and the
Boy [Moth] for Hercules.
Hol. 'Great Hercules is presented by this imp,
Whose club kill'd Cerberus, that three-headed canus;
And, when he was a babe, a child, a shrimp,
Thus did he strangle serpents in his manus. 592
Quoniam he seemeth in minority,
Ergo I come with this apology.'
Keep some state in thy exit, and vanish.—
Exit Boy.
'Judas I am.—' 596
Dum. A Judas!
Hol. Not Iscariot, sir.
'Judas I am, ycleped Maccabæus.'
Dum. Judas Maccabæus clipt is plain Judas. 600
Ber. A kissing traitor. How art thou prov'd Judas?
Hol. 'Judas I am.—'
Dum. The more shame for you, Judas.
Hol. What mean you, sir? 604
Boyet. To make Judas hang himself.
Hol. Begin, sir; you are my elder.
Ber. Well follow'd: Judas was hanged on an elder.
Hol. I will not be put out of countenance. 608
Ber. Because thou hast no face.
Hol. What is this?
Boyet. A cittern-head.
Dum. The head of a bodkin. 612
Ber. A death's face in a ring.
Long. The face of an old Roman coin, scarce seen.
Boyet. The pommel of Cæsar's falchion.
Dum. The carved-bone face on a flask.616
Ber. Saint George's half-cheek in a brooch.
Dum. Ay, and in a brooch of lead.
Ber. Ay, and worn in the cap of a toothdrawer.
And now forward; for we have put thee in countenance. 620
Hol. You have put me out of countenance.
Ber. False: we have given thee faces.
Hol. But you have outfaced them all.
Ber. An thou wert a lion, we would do so. 624
Boyet. Therefore, as he is an ass, let him go.
And so adieu, sweet Jude! nay, why dost thou stay?
Dum. For the later end of his name.
Ber. For the ass to the Jude? give it him:—Jud-as, away! 628
Hol. This is not generous, not gentle, not humble.
Boyet. A light for Monsieur Judas! it grows dark, he may stumble. [Hol. retires.]
Prin. Alas! poor Maccabæus, how hath he been baited.
Enter Braggart [i.e. Armado, for Hector].
Ber. Hide thy head, Achilles: here comes 632
Hector in arms.
Dum. Though my mocks come home by me,
I will now be merry.
King. Hector was but a Troyan in respect of 636
this.
Boyet. But is this Hector?
King. I think Hector was not so clean-tim-
bered. 640
Long. His calf is too big for Hector's.
Dum. More calf, certain.
Boyet. No; he is best indued in the small.
Ber. This cannot be Hector. 644
Dum. He's a god or a painter; for he makes
faces.
Arm. 'The armipotent Mars, of lances the almighty,
Gave Hector a gift,—' 648
Dum. A gilt nutmeg.
Ber. A lemon.
Long. Stuck with cloves.
Dum. No, cloven. 652
Arm. Peace!
'The armipotent Mars, of lances the almighty,
Gave Hector a gift, the heir of Ilion;
A man so breath'd, that certain he would fight ye 656
From morn till night, out of his pavilion.
I am that flower,—'
Dum. That mint.
Long. That columbine.
Arm. Sweet Lord Longaville, rein thy tongue.
Long. I must rather give it the rein, for it 660
runs against Hector.
Dum. Ay, and Hector's a greyhound.
Arm. The sweet war-man is dead and rotten;
sweet chucks, beat not the bones of the buried; 664
when he breathed, he was a man. But I will for-
ward with my device. [To the Princess.] Sweet
royalty, bestow on me the sense of hearing.
Prin. Speak, brave Hector; we are much de- 668
lighted.
Arm. I do adore thy sweet Grace's slipper.
Boyet. [Aside to Dumaine.] Loves her by the foot. 672
Dum. [Aside to Boyet.] He may not by the
yard.
Arm. 'This Hector far surmounted Hannibal,—'
[Berowne returns with Costard.]
Cost. The party is gone; fellow Hector, she is 676
gone; she is two months on her way.
Arm. What meanest thou?
Cost. Faith, unless you play the honest Troy-
an, the poor wench is cast away: she's quick; 680
the child brags in her belly already: 'tis yours.
Arm. Dost thou infamonize me among po-
tentates? Thou shalt die.
Cost. Then shall Hector be whipped for Ja- 684
quenetta that is quick by him, and hanged for
Pompey that is dead by him.
Dum. Most rare Pompey!
Boyet. Renowned Pompey! 688
Ber. Greater than great, great, great, great
Pompey! Pompey the Huge!
Dum. Hector trembles.
Ber. Pompey is moved. More Ates, more 692
Ates! stir them on! stir them on!
Dum. Hector will challenge him.
Ber. Ay, if a' have no more man's blood in 's
belly than will sup a flea. 696
Arm. By the north pole, I do challenge thee.
Cost. I will not fight with a pole, like a
northern man: I'll slash; Ill do it by the
sword. I bepray you, let me borrow my arms 700
again.
Dum. Room for the incensed Worthies!
Cost. I'll do it in my shirt.
Dum. Most resolute Pompey! 704
Moth. Master, let me take you a button-hole
lower. Do you not see, Pompey is uncasing for
the combat? What mean you? you will lose
your reputation. 708
Arm. Gentlemen and soldiers, pardon me; I
will not combat in my shirt.
Dum. You may not deny it; Pompey hath
made the challenge. 712
Arm. Sweet bloods, I both may and will.
Ber. What reason have you for 't?
Arm. The naked truth of it is, I have no
shirt. I go woolward for penance. 716
Boyet. True, and it was enjoined him in Rome
for want of linen; since when, I'll be sworn, he
wore none but a dish-clout of Jaquenetta's, and
that a' wears next his heart for a favour. 720
Enter a Messenger, Monsieur Marcade.
Mar. God save you, madam!
Prin. Welcome, Marcade;
But that thou interrupt'st our merriment.
Mar. I am sorry, madam; for the news I bring 724
Is heavy in my tongue. The king your father—
Prin. Dead, for my life!
Mar. Even so: my tale is told.
Ber. Worthies, away! The scene begins to 728
cloud.
Arm. For mine own part, I breathe free breath.
I have seen the day of wrong through the little
hole of discretion, and I will right myself like a 732
soldier. Exeunt Worthies.
King. How fares your majesty?
Prin. Boyet, prepare: I will away to-night.
King. Madam, not so: I do beseech you, stay. 736
Prin. Prepare, I say. I thank you, gracious lords,
For all your fair endeavours; and entreat,
Out of a new-sad soul, that you vouchsafe
In your rich wisdom to excuse or hide 740
The liberal opposition of our spirits,
If over-boldly we have borne ourselves
In the converse of breath; your gentleness
Was guilty of it. Farewell, worthy lord! 744
A heavy heart bears not a humble tongue,
Excuse me so, coming too short of thanks
For my great suit so easily obtain'd.
King. The extreme parts, of time. extremely forms 748
All causes to the purpose of his speed,
And often, at his very loose, decides
That which long process could not arbitrate:
And though the mourning brow of progeny 752
Forbid the smiling courtesy of love
The holy suit which fain it would convince;
Yet, since love's argument was first on foot,
Let not the cloud of sorrow justle it 756
From what it purpos'd; since, to wail friends lost
Is not by much so wholesome-profitable
As to rejoice at friends but newly found.
Prin. I understand you not: my griefs are double. 760
Ber. Honest plain words best pierce the ear of grief;
And by these badges understand the king.
For your fair sakes have we neglected time,
Play'd foul play with our oaths. Your beauty, ladies, 764
Hath much deform'd us, fashioning our humours
Even to the opposed end of our intents;
And what in us hath seem'd ridiculous,—
As love is full of unbefitting strains; 768
All wanton as a child, skipping and vain;
Form'd by the eye, and, therefore, like the eye,
Full of straying shapes, of habits and of forms,
Varying in subjects, as the eye doth roll 772
To every varied object in his glance:—
Which parti-coated presence of loose love
Put on by us, if, in your heavenly eyes,
Have misbecom'd our oaths and gravities, 776
Those heavenly eyes, that look into these faults,
Suggested us to make. Therefore, ladies,
Our love being yours, the error that love makes
Is likewise yours: we to ourselves prove false, 780
By being once false for ever to be true
To those that make us both,—fair ladies, you:
And even that falsehood, in itself a sin,
Thus purifies itself and turns to grace. 784
Prin. We have receiv'd your letters full of love;
Your favours, the embassadors of love;
And, in our maiden council, rated them
At courtship, pleasant jest, and courtesy, 788
As bombast and as lining to the time.
But more devout than this in our respects
Have we not been; and therefore met your loves
In their own fashion, like a merriment. 792
Dum. Our letters, madam, show'd much more than jest.
Long. So did our looks.
Ros. We did not quote them so.
King. Now, at the latest minute of the hour,
Grant us your loves.
Prin. A time, methinks, too short 796
To make a world-without-end bargain in.
No, no, my lord, your Grace is perjur'd much,
Full of dear guiltiness; and therefore this:
If for my love,—as there is no such cause,— 800
You will do aught, this shall you do for me:
Your oath I will not trust; but go with speed
To some forlorn and naked hermitage,
Remote from all the pleasures of the world; 804
There stay, until the twelve celestial signs
Have brought about the annual reckoning.
If this austere insociable life
Change not your offer made in heat of blood; 808
If frosts and fasts, hard lodging and thin weeds,
Nip not the gaudy blossoms of your love,
But that it bear this trial and last love;
Then, at the expiration of the year, 812
Come challenge me, challenge me by these deserts,
And, by this virgin palm now kissing thine,
I will be thine; and, till that instant, shut
My woful self up in a mourning house, 816
Raining the tears of lamentation
For the remembrance of my father's death.
If this thou do deny, let our hands part;
Neither intitled in the other's heart. 820
King. If this, or more than this, I would deny,
To flatter up these powers of mine with rest,
The sudden hand of death close up mine eye!
Hence ever then my heart is in thy breast. 824
Ber. And what to me, my love? and what to me?
Ros. You must be purged too, your sins are rack'd:
You are attaint with faults and perjury;
Therefore, if you my favour mean to get, 828
A twelvemonth shall you spend, and never rest,
But seek the weary beds of people sick.
Dum. But what to me, my love? but what to me?
Kath. A wife! A beard, fair health, and honesty; 832
With three-fold love I wish you all these three.
Dum. O! shall I say, I thank you, gentle wife?
Kath. Not so, my lord. A twelvemonth and a day
I'll mark no words that smooth-fac'd wooers say: 836
Come when the king doth to my lady come;
Then, if I have much love, I'll give you some.
Dum. I'll serve thee true and faithfully till then.
Kath. Yet swear not, lest ye be forsworn again. 840
Long. What says Maria?
Mar. At the twelvemonth's end
I'll change my black gown for a faithful friend.
Long. I'll stay with patience; but the time is long.
Mar. The liker you; few taller are so young. 844
Ber. Studies my lady? mistress, look on me.
Behold the window of my heart, mine eye,
What humble suit attends thy answer there;
Impose some service on me for thy love. 848
Ros. Oft have I heard of you, my Lord Berowne,
Before I saw you; and the world's large tongue
Proclaims you for a man replete with mocks,
Full of comparisons and wounding flouts, 852
Which you on all estates will execute
That lie within the mercy of your wit:
To weed this wormwood from your fruitful brain,
And therewithal to win me, if you please,— 856
Without the which I am not to be won,—
You shall this twelvemonth term, from day to day,
Visit the speechless sick, and still converse
With groaning wretches; and your task shall be 860
With all the fierce endeavour of your wit
To enforce the pained impotent to smile.
Ber. To move wild laughter in the throat of death?
It cannot be; it is impossible: 864
Mirth cannot move a soul in agony.
Ros. Why, that's the way to choke a gibing spirit,
Whose influence is begot of that loose grace
Which shallow laughing hearers give to fools. 868
A jest's prosperity lies in the ear
Of him that hears it, never in the tongue
Of him that makes it: then, if sickly ears,
Deaf'd with the clamours of their own dear groans, 872
Will hear your idle scorns, continue then,
And I will have you and that fault withal;
But if they will not, throw away that spirit,
And I shall find you empty of that fault, 876
Right joyful of your reformation.
Ber. A twelvemonth! well, befall what will befall,
I'll jest a twelvemonth in an hospital.
Prin. [To the King.] Ay, sweet my lord; and so I take my leave. 880
King. No, madam; we will bring you on your way.
Ber. Our wooing doth not end like an old play;
Jack hath not Jill; these ladies' courtesy
Might well have made our sport a comedy. 884
King. Come, sir, it wants a twelvemonth and a day,
And then 'twill end.
Ber. That's too long for a play.
Enter Braggart [Armado].
Arm. Sweet majesty, vouchsafe me,—
Prin. Was not that Hector? 888
Dum. The worthy knight of Troy.
Arm. I will kiss thy royal finger, and take
leave. I am a votary; I have vowed to Jaque-
netta to hold the plough for her sweet love three 892
year. But, most esteemed greatness, will you
hear the dialogue that the two learned men have
compiled in praise of the owl and the cuckoo? it
should have followed in the end of our show. 896
King. Call them forth quickly; we will do so.
Arm. Holla! approach.
Enter all.
This side is Hiems, Winter; this Ver, the Spring;
the one maintained by the owl, th' other by the 900
cuckoo. Ver, begin.
The Song.
[Spring.]
'When daisies pied and violets blue
And lady-smocks all silver-white
And cuckoo-buds of yellow hue 904
Do paint the meadows with delight,
The cuckoo then, on every tree,
Mocks married men; for thus sings he,
Cuckoo; 908
Cuckoo, cuckoo: O, word of fear,
Unpleasing to a married ear!
'When shepherds pipe on oaten straws,
And merry larks are ploughmen's clocks, 912
When turtles tread, and rooks, and daws,
And maidens bleach their summer smocks,
The cuckoo then, on every tree,
Mocks married men; for thus sings he, 916
Cuckoo;
Cuckoo, cuckoo: O, word of fear,
Unpleasing to a married ear!'
Winter.
'When icicles hang by the wall, 920
And Dick the shepherd blows his nail,
And Tom bears logs into the hall,
And milk comes frozen home in pail,
When blood is nipp'd, and ways be foul, 924
Then nightly sings the staring owl,
Tu-who;
Tu-whit, tu-who—a merry note,
While greasy Joan doth keel the pot. 928
'When all aloud the wind doth blow,
And coughing drowns the parson's saw,
And birds sit brooding in the snow,
And Marian's nose looks red and raw, 932
When roasted crabs hiss in the bowl,
Then nightly sings the staring owl,
Tu-who;
Tu-whit, tu-who—a merry note, 936
While greasy Joan doth keel the pot.'
Arm. The words of Mercury are harsh after
the songs of Apollo. You, that way: we, this
way. 940
FINIS.
Footnotes to Act V
Scene One
1 Satis quod sufficit: Enough is as good as a feast
2 reasons: arguments, discourse
4 affection: affectation
6 opinion: self-conceit
strange: novel, original
10 Novi . . . te: I know the man as well as I know you
12 filed: polished
14 thrasonical: boastful
picked: fastidious
15 peregrinate: traveled, foreign
19 staple: fiber
21 point-devise: precise
22 fine: mincingly; cf. n.
24 clepeth: calls
25 vocatur: is called, pronounced
28 insanie: insanity
ne . . . domine: do you understand, sir?
30 Laus . . . intelligo: God be praised, I understand well
31 Priscian; cf. n.
33 Videsne . . . venit: Do you see who comes?
34 Video, et gaudeo: I see and am pleased
36 Quare: why
45 honorifi- etc.; cf. n.
46 flap-dragon: a raisin set on fire in brandy
50 horn-book: primer; cf. n.
53 pueritia: childishness, child
61 o, u: i.e. oh, you
63 venew: venue, sally
67 wit-old: i.e. wittol, cuckold
73 circum circa: round and round; cf. n.
82 ad dunghill; cf. n.
86 Arts-man: professor of the liberal arts
præambula: come forward
88 charge-house: schoolhouse; cf. n.
98 generous: well-born
99 liable: suitable
105 inward: private
106 remember . . . courtesy: put on your hat
112 excrement: excrescence, hair on lip
120 chuck: a pet name
128 Nine Worthies; cf. n.
139 pass: pass for (?), surpass (?)
145 Hercules in minority; cf. n.
158 fadge: succeed
159 antick: grotesque entertainment
160 Via: On your way!
165 tabor: a small drum
166 hay: country dance
Scene Two
2 fairings: presents, originally such as were bought at a fair
9 That: so that (there being no blank space left)
10 wax: grow (with quibble on sealing-wax)
12 shrewd . . . gallows: cunning, roguish knave
13 Cf. n.
20 condition: temperament
22 in snuff: in anger, ill (with pun on the snuff of a candle)
26 weigh; cf. n.
30 favour: gift; also face
35 numbers: rhythm
numb'ring: estimate
40 letters; cf. n.
42 text B; cf. n.
43 'Ware pencils; cf. n.
44 red dominical; cf. n.
45 O's: marks left by the smallpox
46 shrows: shrews
51 translation of hypocrisy; cf. n.
61 in . . . week; cf. n.
65 hests: behests; cf. n.
67 perttaunt-like; cf. n.
82 encounters: assailants
87 Saint Denis: patron saint of France
92 addrest: coming straight
96 by and by: soon
101 made a doubt: expressed fear
104 audaciously: boldly
109 fleer'd: grinned
117 spleen ridiculous: ridiculous merriment
118 solemn: sober
121 Like Muscovites; cf. n.
126 task'd: given a task or problem
135 removes: exchanges
154 theirs: their sport
155 intended game: the jest they intend
159 taffeta: i.e. the taffeta, or silk, masks
186 measure: stately dance
201 accompt: reckoning
207 eyne: eyes
209 requests: requestest
210 change: round or 'figure' in dancing
216 man: i.e. man in the moon
225 Prize: set a price on
228 Twice: i.e. twice adieu
233 treys: threes
234 Metheglin: mead containing honey
wort: sweet unfermented beer
malmsey: a sweet wine
236 cog: cheat
238 meet: fitting
243 tongue; cf. n.
248 Veal: i.e. well; cf. n.
250 part: divide; cf. n.
260 sense of sense: i.e. perception
sensible: sensitive
261 conference: conversation
conceits: fancies
264 dry-beaten: cudgeled
269 Well-liking: plump
270 kingly-poor flout: a fling poor for a king
275 weeping-ripe for: ready to weep for want of
278 No point; cf. II. i. 188
280 Qualm: calm; cf. n.
282 statute-caps: woollen caps; cf. n.
290 digest: put up with, 'swallow'
297 commixture: complexion
298 vailing: letting fall
blown: full blown
310 runs: run
319 wakes: night festivals
wassails: drinking bouts
324 can carve: knows the art of amorous glance and gesture
327 tables: backgammon
329 mean: tenor
333 whales-bone: whale's bone, walrus tusk
339 man; cf. n.
350 nickname: misname
362 mess; cf. IV. iii. 207
366 to the manner: after the fashion
374 dry: without savor (with pun on 'thirsty')
393 sound: swoon
401 wish: invite
405 friend: mistress
406 blind harper; cf. n.
408 Three-pil'd: having three piles, superfine
414 russet: homespun, homely
kersey: coarse woollen, plain
420 'Lord have mercy'; cf. n.
423 visited: plague-smitten
424 Lord's tokens: cf. n.
426 states: estates
428 sue: equivocally for prosecute and entreat
435 well advis'd: in right mind
441 force not: i.e. find it easy
461 consent: conspiracy
463 Christmas comedy: absurd burlesque
464 please-man: flatterer
zany: clown
465 trencher-knight: serving-man, parasite
466 years: i.e. wrinkles, such as belong to years
473 upon this: in this fashion
475 squire: square, rule
476 apple: pupil
479 allow'd: privileged to jest
483 manage: horsemanship
career: swift encounter of knights
491 beg us: prove us fools; cf. n.
502 Pompion: pumpkin
517, 518 Cf. n.
521 our sport: i.e. the disguise as Muscovites
527 God his: God's
531 fortuna . . . guerra: the fortune of war
533 couplement: couple, pair
543 hedge-priest: poor, illiterate priest
545 Abate . . . novum: except for a rare throw of the dice; cf. n.
549 libbard's: leopard's; cf. n.
566 right: straight; cf. n.
576 painted cloth; cf. n.
577 lion . . . poll-axe; cf. n.
585 o'erparted: i.e. given a part too difficult for him
590 canus: canis, dog
592 manus: hands
593 Quoniam: since
594 Ergo: therefore
601 A kissing traitor; cf. n.
607 elder; cf. n.
611 cittern: cithern, guitar
612 bodkin: small dagger
613 death's face: death's head
616 flask: powder flask
619 toothdrawer; cf. n.
634 by: about, near
636 Troyan: Trojan, contemptible fellow
640 clean-timbered: well-built
643 small: small of the leg
656 breath'd: endowed with breath, vigorous
676 party: i.e. Jaquenetta
682 infamonize: infamize
692 Ates: mischief; cf. n.
699 northern man: countryman from the north, boor
705 take . . . lower: (1) help you to strip, (2) humiliate you
716 woolward: i.e. with wool, instead of linen, next to the skin
732 hole of discretion; cf. n.
741 liberal: over-free
743 converse of breath: conversation
745 humble: suited to the offering of thanks and apologies
748, 749 Cf. n.
750 loose: loosing, parting
754 convince: give proof of
760 double: excessive (?)
762 badges; cf. n.
766 In a way quite opposite to our intentions
768 strains: impulses
774 parti-coated: motley-coated
778 Suggested: tempted
789 bombast: padding
790 devout: serious
respects: reflections
794 quote: cf. IV. iii. 87
799 dear: amiable
806 Completed the twelve months of the year
809 weeds: clothing
811 last: remain
820 intitled: having any right
824 Cf. n.
825-830 Cf. n.
826 rack'd: i.e. unnaturally extended
843 stay: wait
844 liker; cf. n.
850 large: lavish
852 comparisons: personalities
853 estates: ranks
865 agony: i.e. of death
872 dear: intense
874 withal: also
881 bring: attend
899 Cf. n.
903 lady-smocks: cardamine pratensis, May-flower
904 cuckoo-buds: buttercups or cowslips
913 turtles: turtle-doves
928 keel: cool by stirring
930 saw: maxim or wise talk
933 crabs: wild, sour apples
bowl: i.e. wassail-bowl