Page:A Treatise concerning the Use and Abuse of the Marriage Bed.djvu/53

This page has been validated.

[ 39 ]

and unfeigned sincere Love, founded on real Merit, Suitability and Virtue. These confirm the Felicity, if they may not be said really to constitute it: Nor, in a word, is there one Match in fifty happy and successful without it.

Now, to come to the last Clause in the Title of this Chapter; it is for want of these calm deliberate Proceedings in the Apparatus of Matrimony, for want of weighing Circumstances, and suiting Persons to one another, that Matrimony is so often abused; suitability of Persons is one of the greatest and most important Difficulties that lie before the marrying Couple for their Consideration. The Temper of the Person is not easily discovered, nor does it require a little Judgment and Discretion to dive into the Disposition of the Person; looking too narrowly for Defeats (since all Tempers may have Failings) may be injurious on one hand; as covering the Infirmities which discover themselves too evidently, may be injurious on another.

I knew a certain Lady in the critical Time of Courtship, mighty inquisitive about the Qualifications, the Temper, and the Merit of the Gentleman; and it was thought she shewed abundance of Prudence and Caution in her Observation of his Conduct, and her Enquiries into his Character. It happened, one particular Person, who was very intimate in the Family of the Gentleman, and knew him more particularly than most did, had so much Integrity as to inform the Lady's Friend who she sent to enquire about him, that he was a hard Drinker, and that particularly he was very ill-humoured and quarrelsome when in drink; tho'

D 4
'twas