Page:A biographical dictionary of eminent Scotsmen, vol 1.djvu/45

practice as a surgeon. His manner in both capacities was marked by many eccentricities, but particularly in the latter. He could not endure the tedious and confused narratives which patients are apt to lay before a consulting surgeon, and, in checking these, was not apt to regard much the rules of good-breeding. Considerable risks were thus encountered for the sake of his advice; but this was generally so excellent, that those who required it were seldom afraid to hazard the slight offence to their feelings with which it was liable to be accompanied. Many anecdotes of Mr Abernethy's rencounters with his patients are preserved in the profession. The two following are given in Sir James Eyre's recent work, "The Stomach and its Difficulties:" "A very talkative lady, who had wearied the temper of Mr Abernethy, which was at all times impatient of gabble, was told by him, the first moment that he could get a chance of speaking, to be good enough to put out her tongue. 'Now, pray, madam,' said he, playfully, 'keep it out.' The hint was taken. He rarely met with his match, but on one occasion he fairly owned that he had. He was sent for to an innkeeper, who had had a quarrel with his wife, and who had scored his face with her nails, so that the poor man was bleeding, and much disfigured. Mr Abernethy considered this an opportunity not to be lost for admonishing the offender, and said, 'Madam, are you not ashamed of yourself to treat your husband thus; the husband, who is the head of all, your head, madam, in fact?' 'Well, doctor,' fiercely retorted the virago, 'and may I not scratch my own head?' Upon this her friendly adviser, after giving directions for the benefit of the patient, turned upon his heel, and confessed himself beaten for once." But abruptness and rudeness were not his only eccentricities. He carried practical benevolence to a pitch as far from the common line as any of his other peculiarities. Where poverty and disease prevented patients from waiting upon him in his own house, he was frequently known, not only to visit them constantly, and at inconvenient distances, without fee or reward, but generously to supply them from his own purse with what their wants required. Perhaps the most striking, out of the numerous anecdotes which have been related of him, in illustration of his eccentricities, is one descriptive of his courtship, or rather of his no-courtship. "While attending a lady for several weeks, he observed those admirable qualifications in her daughter, which he truly esteemed to be calculated to make the marriage state happy. Accordingly, on a Saturday, when taking leave of his patient, he addressed her to the following purport: 'You are now so well that I need not see you after Monday next, when I shall come and pay you my farewell visit. But, in the meantime, I wish you and your daughter seriously to consider the proposal I am now about to make. It is abrupt and unceremonious, I am aware; but the excessive occupation of my time, by my professional duties, affords me no leisure to accomplish what I desire by the more ordinary course of attention and solicitation. My annual receipts amount to £____ and I can settle £____ on my wife; my character is generally known to the public, so that you may readily ascertain what it is. I have seen in your daughter a tender and affectionate child, an assiduous and careful nurse, and a gentle and ladylike member of a family; such a person must be all that a husband could covet, and I offer my hand and fortune for her acceptance. On Monday, when I call, I shall expect your determination; for I really have not time for the routine of courtship.' In this humour the lady was wooed and won, and the union proved fortunate in every respect. A happier couple never existed."