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17
A RETORT.
The late Alexander Bilsland, High Street, was a man of some wit, and very good at a retort; he was very irritable and easily offended. One day a poor student offended him and got some crusty answer, when the dominie said, "Yere unco short the day, Saunders." "Od man," said the other, "Yere no sae lang yeresel."
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A WITNESS
A witness was examined before a judge in a case of slander, who required him to repeat the precise words spoken. The witness hesitated until he rivetted the attention of the court upon him: then, fixing his eyes earnestly on the judge, began—"May it please your honour, you lie, and steal, get your living by stealing!"
