lose all, and there would be no hope of ever again rescuing it. You are so diligent in keeping an account of your money, lest by chance any should be lost if a sudden death were to befall you; and if death should come upon you unawares, while you are at enmity with God, what would become of your soul for all eternity?
Affections and Prayers.
All, my Redeemer, Thou hast shed all Thy Blood. Thou hast given Thy life to save my soul, and I have so often lost it, hoping in Thy mercy; and in this way have I so often made use of Thy great goodness, for what? to offend Thee more. For this, I did deserve that Thou shouldst suddenly deprive me of life, and then send me to everlasting punishment. I have as it were been striving with Thee; but Thou hast striven, by showing mercy towards me, and I by offending Thee; Thou by seeking me, and I by flying from Thee; Thou by giving me time to implore pardon for all the offences committed against Thee, and I by using that time to add offence to offence. Gracious Lord, make me feel the great wrong I have done against Thee, and make me feel that it is my greatest duty to love Thee. Ah, my Jesus, how couldst Thou love me so much, Thou who didst seek me so many times when I strove to drive Thee from me? How couldst Thou show so many favours to one who has so often given Thee offence? From all this I feel how desirous Thou art for me not to be lost. I repent with all my heart for having offended Thee, O God of infinite goodness. Ah, receive this ungrateful sheep who returns repentant to Thy feet; receive it, and bind it to Thy shoulders, so that it may never more stray from Thee. No, I will never more fly from Thee. I would love Thee, I would be Thine, and if only I am Thine I am content with every pain, for what greater pain can I feel, than to live without Thy grace, separated from Thee, Who art my God, Who hast created me, and my God Who has died for me? Ah, hateful sins, what have you done? You have made me displease my dear Saviour, Who hast loved me so much. Ah, my Jesus, as Thou hast died for me, even so ought I to die for Thee. Thou didst die for love of me, and I ought to die of grief for having so much displeased Thee.
