baseness of her nature, I wondered for what purpose I had killed that lady. I could think of nothing but the misery of my deed. I felt as though my entrails were dissolving, but I could not content myself merely with weeping. I decided that I would shave my hair, making what had happened my guide in the way of salvation. That very night I went to see a Buddhist monk, whose disciple I became. Shortly afterward I climbed this mountain.
“I realize how much you must hate me. Kill me in any way you choose. Even though you cut me into a thousand slices, I shall not complain. I should mention, however, that if you kill me it may harm the lady in whatever life she is living now. The Three Treasures are my witness that I do not say this because of any attachment to this life. Now I have said all that I have to say. I leave the rest to you.”
The priest Kasuya said, “Even if you had been led to abandon the world by some perfectly commonplace thing, how could I ever hate a fellow priest? But I know now that you abandoned the world because of the same lady, and I feel all the more closely tied to you. It must be that the lady was a manifestation of a bodhisattva who took the form of a woman to save us, who otherwise would have missed the Way. When I realize what compassion she showed in guiding us, I find it all the harder to forget the things of the past. If they had not happened, how would we ever have become priests and forsaken the transient world? To have received this absolute happiness must be our joy within sorrow. From today forward I shall be grateful for that event which led me to seek the Way.” So speaking he wetted with tears the sleeve of his dark robes.
Translated by Donald Keene
