Page:Awful Disclosures of Maria Monk (Truslove & Bray).djvu/68

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MARIA MONK
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penances upon her favourites, on other occasions she was regardless of consequences herself, and preferred to take all the blame, to shield others. I have often known her to break silence in the community, as if she had no object beyond that of causing disturbance, or exciting a smile, and as soon as it was noticed, exclaim, "Say it's me, say it's me!" Sometimes she would expose herself to punishment in place of another who was guilty; and thus I found it difficult to understand her. In some cases she seemed out of her wits, as the Superior and priests commonly represented her; but generally I saw in her what prevented me from accounting her insane.

Once she gave me the name of the "Devout English Reader," because I was often appointed to read the lecture to the English girls; and sometimes, sitting near me under pretence of deafness, would whisper it in my hearing, for she knew my want of self-command when excited to laughter. Thus she often exposed me to penances for a breach of decorum, and set me to biting my lips, to avoid laughing outright in the midst of a solemn lecture. "Oh! you devout English reader!" she would say, with something so ludicrous, that I had to exert myself to the utmost to avoid observation.

This came so often at one time that I grew uneasy, and told her I must confess it, to unburden my conscience. Sometimes she would pass behind us as we stood at dinner ready to sit down, and softly moving back our chairs, leaving us to fall down upon the floor, and while we were laughing together, she would spring forward, kneel to the Superior, and beg her pardon and a penance.