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THE BATTERY AND THE BOILER.

"There, sir, you 've put your foot in it at last," said the lugubrious waiter.

Robin thought he referred to the interruption, but the waiter's eyes and forefinger directed his attention to the soup tureen, which, in his eagerness, he had sacrificed with a stamp. Finding that no further notice was taken of the interruption, he listened, while Sam continued:—

"Yes, gentlemen, I have some difficulty in starting, but, once set agoing, gentlemen, I can keep on like an alarum clock. What nonsense have some of you fellows been talking! Some of you have remarked that you shall be able to exchange messages with England in a few hours. Allow me to assure you that before long you will accomplish that feat in a few minutes."

"Pooh! pooh!" ejaculated an irascible old gentleman with a bald head.

"Did you say 'pooh!' sir?" demanded Sam, with a terrible frown.

"I did, sir," replied the old gentleman, with a contemptuous smile.

"Then, sir, take that."

Sam hurled a wine decanter at the old gentleman, which, missing its mark, fell with a loud crash at the feet of Robin, who awoke with a start to find Sam shaking him by the arm.

"Wake up, Robin," he said; "man, you 've lost the