CHAPTER XXIII
Candide and Martin Touch Upon the English Coast;
What They Saw There
“Ah Pangloss! Pangloss! Ah, Martin! Martin! Ah, my dear Miss Cunegund! What sort of a world is this?” Thus exclaimed Candide, as soon as he had got on board the Dutch ship.
“Why, something very foolish, and very abominable,” said Martin.
“You are acquainted with England,” said Candide; “are they as great fools in that country, as in France?”
“Yes, but in a different manner,” answered Martin. “You know that these two nations are at war about a few acres of snow in the neighbourhood of Canada, and that they have expended much greater sums in the contest than all Canada is worth. To say exactly whether there are a greater number fit to be inhabitants of a mad-house in the one country than the other, exceeds the limits of my imperfect capacity; I know, in general, that the people we are going to visit, are of a very dark and gloomy disposition.”
As they were chatting thus together, they arrived at Portsmouth. The shore, on each side of the harbour, was lined with a multitude of people, whose eyes were steadfastly fixed on a lusty man, who was kneeling down on the deck of one of the men of war, with his eyes bound. Opposite to this personage stood four soldiers, each of whom shot three bullets into his skull, with all the composure imaginable; and when it was done, the whole company went away perfectly well satisfied.
“What the devil is all this for?” said Candide; “and what demon lords it thus over all the world?”
He then asked who was that lusty man who had been sent out of the world with so much ceremony, and he received for answer, that it was an admiral.
“And, pray,” he said, “why do you put your admiral to death?”
