Infant marriage is not prohibited, but is not common, and both men and girls are usually married after they have reached maturity. There are two forms of marriage, one called kai dhāre for marriages between virgins and bachelors, the other called budu dhāre for the marriage of widows. After a match has been arranged, the formal betrothal, called ponnapāthera or nischaya tambula, takes place. The bridegroom's relatives and friends proceed in a body on the appointed day to the bride's house, and are there entertained at a grand dinner, to which the bride's relatives and friends are also bidden. Subsequently the karnavans (heads) of the two families formally engage to perform the marriage, and plates of betel leaves and areca nuts are exchanged, and the betel and nuts partaken of by the two parties. The actual marriage ceremony is performed at the house of the bride or bridegroom, as may be most convenient. The proceedings commence with the bridegroom seating himself in the marriage pandal, a booth or canopy specially erected for the occasion. He is there shaved by the village barber, and then retires and bathes. This done, both he and the bride are conducted to the pandal by their relations, or sometimes by the village headman. They walk thrice round the seat, and then sit down side by side. The essential and binding part of the ceremony, called dhare, then takes place. The right hand of the bride being placed over the right hand of the bridegroom, a silver vessel (dhāre gindi) filled with water, with a cocoanut over the mouth and the flower of the areca palm on the cocoanut, is placed on the joined hands. The parents, the managers of the two families, and the village headmen all touch the vessel, which, with the hands of the bridal pair, is moved up and down three times. In certain families the water is poured from the
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