As a whole company of hogs.
"But harkee, Ben, i'll grant admittance
At the same rate I paid myself."
"Nay, master, leave me half the pittance,"
Cried the avaricious elf.
"No, no-all or none; a full aequittance:
The terms are somewhat high, I own,
But it was you who fixed the price--not I."
So, finding all his haggling vain,
Ben, with a grin and groan of pain,
Drew out the guinea and restored it.
"Surely you'll give me, "-cried the outwitted Porter,
When again admitted,
"Something, now you've done your joking,
For all this trouble, time, and soaking.
"Oh! surely, surely," Harry cries;
"Since, as you urge, I broke your rest,
You are half drowned, and quite undrest,
I'll give you--leave to go to bed."
ANON.
THE MILKMAID AND THE BANKER.
A milkmaid, with a very pretty face,
Who lived at Acton,
Had a black cow, the ugliest in the place,
A crooked back'd one;
A beast as dangerous, too, as she was frightful,
Vicious and spiteful,
And so confirm'd a truant, that she bounded
Over the hedges daily, and got pounded.
"Twas all vain to tie her with a tether,
For then both cord and cow cloped together.
Arm'd with oaken bough, (what folly!
It should have been of birch, or thorn, or holly.)
Patty, one day, was driving home the beast,
Which had, as usual, slipp'd its anchor,
When on the road she met a certain banker,
Who stopp'd to give his eyes a feast
By gazing on her features crimson'd high
By a long cow-chase in July.
"Are you from Acton, pretty lass," he cried:
"Yes, with a courtsey, she replied.
"Why, then, you know the laundress, Sally Wrench?"
"She is my cousin, sir, and next door neighbour."
