Page:Departmental Ditties and Ballads and Barrack-Room Ballads, Kipling, 1899.djvu/83

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"I follow no man's carriage, and no, never in my life
"Have I flirted at Peliti's with another Bandar's wife.

"Oh man of futile fopperies—unnecessary wraps;
"I own no ponies in the hills, I drive no tall-wheeled traps.
"I buy me not twelve-button gloves, 'short-sixes' eke, of rings,
"Nor do I waste at Hamilton's my wealth on pretty things.

"I quarrel with my wife at home, we never fight abroad;
"But Mrs. B. has grasped the fact I am her only lord.
"I never heard of fever—dumps nor debts depress my soul;
"And I pity and despise you!" Here he pouched my breakfast-roll.

His hide was very mangy and his face was very red,
And undisguisedly he scratched with energy his head.
His manners were not always nice, but how my spirit cried
To be an artless Bandar loose upon the mountain side!