grace to myself and to all who knew me, hated by God and man, on account of my manifold sins, I not only wished myself dead, but I think I would have committed suicide had I known how to bring about my end.
My aunt—who was positively weary of me—seized this as a good opportunity for declining any further responsibility in my education, and persuaded my father to put me out as a boarder in some school.
I had hitherto dabbled in early vice thoughtlessly and without malice. In that hot-bed of rottenness—a French boarding-school—I soon learnt all the secrets of life, and still—strange to say—it was not by my schoolfellows.
For several reasons I was not placed in the dormitory with the other boys. First I was very young, secondly there was no bed vacant, thirdly my story having been related to the head master, he had been requested to have a sharp look out on my morals; for I was described as a black sheep with the very worst propensities. I was therefore put to sleep with one of the nurses, a stout masculine-looking
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