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THE VIEW ON TO THE MALACHITE POOL 239 been wearing that coat for the last fifteen years, and it’s still like new.’ ‘ Don’t get excited ! It’ll soon look old. Now give me your hat ! And now make your trousers look dusty and pour some Narzan over them. And hurry up ! ’ A few minutes later Hippolyte was disgustingly dirty. ‘ There now, you’re ready; and you’ve every oppor­ tunity of earning money by honest work.’ ' What do you want me to do ? ’ asked Hippolyte mournfully. ‘ Can you speak French ? I hope you can.’

  • Very badly. Only schoolroom French.’

' Well, wen, you’U have to use what you know. Could you say this sentence in French : “ Gentlemen, I have had nothing to eat for six days ” ? ’ ‘ Monsieur,’ began Hippolyte haltingly. ‘ Monsieur . . . er ... er ... je ... ne . . . Is that it ? Je . . . ne ... mange . . . pas . . Six, now what is that in French ? Un, deux, trois, quatre, cinq, six . . . Six jours. Yes, that’s it: Je ne mange pas six jours.’ ‘ A nice pronunciation, I must say,’ said Bender sarcastically ; ‘ but never mind ; you don’t expect much from a beggar. A beggar in Russia will always speak French worse than a beggar in France. How much German do you know ? ’ ‘ What do I want German for ? ’ said Hippolyte. ' You’ll want German,’ said Bender as he emphasized each word. ‘ You’ll want German because you’re going to the gardens to-night, and there you will take up a stand in the shade, and you will beg in French, German, and Russian. And you will impress people with the fact that you are a former member of the State Duma and that you belonged at one time to the Cadet Party. Your net earnings will go to Mechnikov. You understand ? ’