Diaries of Court Ladies
Flowers are falling yet I may see them again when Spring returns.
But, oh, my longing for the dear person who has departed from us forever!
I also heard that the daughter of the First Adviser[1] to the King was lost [dead]. I could sympathize deeply with the sorrow of her lord, the Lieutenant-General, for I still felt my own sorrow.
When I had first arrived at the Capital I had been given a book of the handwriting of this noble lady for my copy-book. In it were written several poems, among them the following:
When you see the smoke floating up the valley of Toribe Hill,[2]
Then you will understand me, who seemed as shadow-like even while living.
I looked at these poems which were written in such a beautiful handwriting, and I shed more tears. I sat brooding until mother troubled herself to console me. She searched for romances and gave them to me, and I became consoled unconsciously. I read a few volumes of Genji-monogatari and longed for the rest, but as I was still a stranger here I had no way of finding them. I was all impatience and yearning, and in my mind was always praying that I might read all the books of Genji-monogatari from the very first one.
While my parents were shutting themselves up in Udzu-Masa[3] Temple, I asked them for nothing ex-
