Half a Man
"I WASH me 'ands uv 'im," I tells 'em, straight.
"You women can do wot yeh dash well like.
I leave this 'arf a man to 'is own fate;
I've done me bit, an' now I'm gone on strike.
Do wot yeh please; but don't arsk 'elp from me;
'E's give me nerves; so now I'll let 'im be."
Doreen an' ole Mar Flood 'as got a scheme.
They've been conspirin' for a week or more
About this Digger Smith, an' now they dream
They've got 'is fucher waitin' in cool store
To 'and 'im out, an' fix 'im up for life.
But they've got Buckley's, as I tells me wife.
I've seen 'em whisperin' up in our room.
Now they wants me to join in the debate;
But, "Nix," I tells 'em. "I ain't in the boom,
An' Digger Smith ain't risin' to me bait;
'E's fur too fly a fish for me to catch,
An' two designin' women ain't 'is match."
