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Logic and Spotted Dog

I cuts another slice an' sez, "This spotted dog's a treat.
Uv course, 'ooever left it there," I sez, "wus—indiscreet."
"Careless!" she sez. "You know you are! 'E might 'a' cut 'is face!
An axe as sharp as that," she sez, "should be kep' in its place."
Quite right," I sez. "An' not," she sez, "just thrown round anywhere.
You left it there!"

An' then I lets 'er 'ave it, an' I sez, "Now, think a bit.
I put that axe away last night when all the wood wus split."
"Well, that's enough about it now," she sez. I seen 'er wince,
An' sez, "I put that axe away, an' 'aven't used it since;
But someone else wus usin' it this mornin', I kin swear,
An' left it there."

"Well, never mind... Poor Bill!" she sez. "Was 'is poor thumb all 'urt?"
(Oh, it's entertainin' sometimes fer to argue wiv a skirt.)
"There's someone else," I sez, an' grins, an' kids I'm doin' fine,
"Wus usin' it this mornin' fer to cut a bit uv pine.