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Recipe for Lowness of Spirits.
Take one ounce of spirit of resolution, properly mixed with the oil of good conscience, infuse into it a spoonful of the salt of patience, distil very carefully a composing plant called, OTHERS WOES, which you will find in every part of the garden of life, growing under the broad leaves of disguise; some drops of this will very much assist the salts of patience in their operation; gather a handful of blossoms of hope, sweeten these properly with the balm of providence, if you can procure any of the genuine cordial of true friendship, you will have the most valuable medicine that can be administered; but take care of a counterfeit kind which is very common, is entirely different in its nature, though very like it in its appearance, and whose proper name is self-interest; a small drop of this poisonous plant is sufficient to spoil the whole composition - Make these ingredients into pills, which you may ca(illegible text)e pill's of comfort; take one every night as you lie down to rest, and when you awake in the morning.
Comparisons of Drunkenness.
As drunk as an Owl -— as drunk as a sow — as drunk as a beggar — as drunk as the Devil — as drunk as a Lord. The explanation of which is as follows.
A man is as drunk as an Owl, when he cannot see: He is as drunk as a Sow, when he tumbles in the dirt: He is as drunk as a Beggar, when he is very impudent: He is as drunk as the Devil, when he is inclined to mischief: And as drunk as a Lord, when he is every thing that is bad.
An Irish gentleman, previous to a trial in which he wass the defendant, was informed by his counsel, that if there were any of the jury to whom he had any personal objections to legally "challenge them;" O yes replied the Irishman, so I will; if they don't bring me off handsomely, I will challenge every man of them.
FINIS.
Falkirk, Printed by T. Johnston; Of whom may be had
variety of Pamphlets & Ballads in wholesale & retail.
