"Then your mistress will do," said the gentleman.
"She," said the girl, "is gone out, too."
"My business is of consequence," returned he; "is your master's son at home?"
"No, sir," replied the girl, "he is gone out."
"That's unlucky, indeed," replied he; "but perhaps it may not be long before they return; I will step in and sit by your fire."
"Oh, sir," said the girl, "the fire has gone out, too."
Upon this the gentleman good-temperedly bade her inform her master that he did not expect to be received so coolly.
Fools are Best Kept Apart.
A proud parson and his man, riding over a common, saw a shepherd tending his flock in a new coat. The parson asked in a haughty tone, who gave him that coat.
"The same people," said the shepherd, "that clothe you—the parish."
The parson, nettled a little, rode on, murmuring, a considerable way, and sent his man back to ask the shepherd if he would come and live with him, for he wanted a fool. The man went to the shepherd, accordingly, and delivered his master's message, concluding that his master really wanted a fool.
"Are you going away, then?" said the shepherd.
"No," answered the other.
"Then you may tell your master," replied the shepherd, "his living won't maintain three of us."
A Good Move.
Sheridan being on a Parliamentary committee, one day entered the room as all the members were seated, and ready to commence business. Perceiving no empty seat, he bowed, and looking round the table with a droll expression of countenance, said, "Will any gentleman move that I may take the chair?"
Letter from a Father in Sunderland, to his Son in Newcastle.
Son,—Thy mother hath taken an old coat of mine, to make thee one against this time. I have sent Peggy with the old mare; thou and she can ride back by turns. I am told thou makest
