center her affectional interest in her father, who in this way becomes in the course of time her conception of the ideal of the opposite sex. Therefore, in later years, when the girl takes an interest in young men she is unconsciously influenced by her father's traits of character or physical attributes, and encourages those who may possess such traits or attributes, and promptly discourages those who do not. It is true that these identifying characteristics may be remote or far-fetched—but nevertheless, if it is a real love match, her lover in some important respects measures up to the psychic image of her ideal (her father).
It might be asked why does the male child normally pattern his sexual ideal after the mother, and the female child after the father?[1] That is so far one of the secrets of nature—we only know from observation upon human beings, and from observation and experiment upon animals, that it is so. It will be remembered also that we discussed in the preceding pages the sexual attraction of one sex for the opposite sex that exists throughout nature.
When, in unusual cases, because of abnormal home conditions, the child learns to accept the parent of its own sex as the ideal for a mate, there is apt to develop a tendency to homosexuality, or some other aberration of its love-life.
- ↑ On the other hand, the development of the ego-ideal works just the other way about. Normally, every young boy looks upon his father as the ideal of manhood, and the male child hopes some day to be a "big, strong man like daddy." This is so whether the father is really big and strong or not; he seems all-powerful in the child's small world. Therefore, quite unconsciously, the boy normally makes the father his ideal of manhood-just as he has made his mother the ideal of womanhood, to whom later in life he will unconsciously compare all other women, and they must be in some way identified with, and measure up to, this sexual ideal that is indelibly registered in his mind. The whole situation, of course, is just reversed for the girl, both as to the ego ideal, and the sexual ideal.
