but I couldn't, Paul. I had to show it to Bob and see his reactions. I know now that I love him and have loved him all along. He didn't say much after reading your letter … Never told me he loved me … and you would have laughed to have seen us fighting. We really had one and I'm glad it happened because I feel even closer to Bob and I think he feels the same way toward me.
I wish you were here so that I could talk to you instead of writing. My words seem misplaced too, like you said yours did.
I do so want to be your friend and hope that I'll be able to see you as planned. I guess we are a lot alike and I'm so glad I met you. Something good is bound to comc from our friendship. It has to me, for just knowing you, even if it was for such a short time, has opened my eyes to facts that really do exist.
After school I'm going to try and get Bob to come to New Orleans with me. I'd love for you to meet him and I want so much for him to meet you. He's such a wonderful person. So different than I am. I only wish I were like him.
After graduation I just know I won't be able to stand it around this town. If it wasn't for Bob, I'd be tempted to leave today.
I hope that everything works out for you and that you will find someone just as wonderful as Bob. You deserve the best … I wish it were possible for it to be me, but feeling the way I do toward Bob, makes that impossible, and I'm sure you'll understand. There are so many things I'd like to say but maybe you won't want to finish this letter now that you know the way I feel. I hope you will, for I certainly don't want to hurt you. Only to be honest with you and not lie … You told me never to lie and I will do exactly that, Paul.
Write me if you find it in your heart to do so. If I don't hear from you I'll understand.
