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JULIE'S DIARY
157

you imagine I should come here and upset your plans.' His face got that nervous look I dread.

'I think you are a little unreasonable,' he said.

'Perhaps. Then please excuse that also as well as my coming; I shall go at once. Good-bye, I hope you will have a jolly time.'

'But you need not go at once. We are not starting for an hour.'

'I think it is better. Besides what could we do in such a short time, and it would be a pity for you to be compromised by being seen with me.'

He held my hand for a long time and shook his head seriously at me. 'You are most unjust to me,' he said at last. 'Do you really believe that it is for my own sake that I am afraid of our being seen together?'

'No; of course not. It is only natural you should take care of my reputation; you have always guarded it so well.'

He did not answer, but dropped my hand, murmured a good-bye, and went without looking back.

I could have killed him! But as I watched him slowly disappear without once looking back, I had to use all my strength not to call out to him. When he had quite disappeared, I sank down in despair. I lay huddled up sobbing amongst the trees, imploring his forgiveness, and saying that he could beat me and illtreat me as much as he liked if he would only not go and leave me alone.

But when again I went down to the high-road I saw two large waggonettes driving towards me,