“Have you any difficulties about doctrines—about the Articles?” he said, trying hard to think of the question simply for Fred’s sake.
“No; I suppose the Articles are right. I am not prepared with any arguments to disprove them, and much better, cleverer fellows than I am go in for them entirely. I think it would be rather ridiculous in me to urge scruples of that sort, as if I were a judge,” said Fred, quite simply.
“I suppose, then, it has occurred to you that you might be a fair parish priest without being much of a divine?”
“Of course, if I am obliged to be a clergyman, I shall try and do my duty, though I mayn’t like it. Do you think anybody ought to blame me?”
“For going into the Church under the circumstances? That depends on your conscience, Fred—how far you have counted the cost, and seen what your position will require of you. I can only tell you about myself, that I have always been too lax, and have been uneasy in consequence.”
“But there is another hindrance,” said Fred, colouring. “I did not tell you before, though perhaps I may have said things that made you guess it. There is somebody I am very fond of: I have loved her ever since we were children.”
“Miss Garth, I suppose?” said the Vicar, examining some labels very closely.
“Yes. I shouldn’t mind anything if she would have me. And I know I could be a good fellow then.”
“And you think she returns the feeling?”
“She never will say so; and a good while ago she made me promise not to speak to her about it again. And she has set her mind especially against my being a clergyman; I know that. But I can’t give her up. I do think she cares about me. I saw Mrs Garth last night, and she said that Mary was staying at Lowick Rectory with Miss Farebrother.”
“Yes, she is very kindly helping my sister. Do you wish to go there?”
“No, I want to ask a great favour of you. I am ashamed to bother you in this way; but Mary might listen to what you said, if you mentioned the subject to her—I mean about my going into the Church.”
“That is rather a delicate task, my dear Fred. I shall have to presuppose your attachment to her; and to enter on the subject as you wish me to do, will be asking her to tell me whether she returns it.”
“That is what I want her to tell you,” said Fred, bluntly. “I don’t know what to do, unless I can get at her feeling.”
“You mean that you would be guided by that as to your going into the Church?”
“If Mary said she would never have me I might as well go wrong in one way as another.”
