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MISS MAPP

Puffin and that sweet little Scotch clergyman all fall in love with me, and fight duels about me, I will stop for ever....”

The Major recovered himself before anybody else.

“Your ladyship may take that for granted,” he said gallantly, and a perfect hubbub of conversation rose to cover this awful topic.

She laid her hand on his arm.

“You must not call me ladyship, Captain Flint,” she said. “Only servants say that. Contessa, if you like. And you must blow away this fog for me. I have seen nothing but bales of cotton-wool out of the window. Tell me this, too: why are those ladies dressed alike? Are they sisters? Mrs. Mapp, the little round one, and her sister, the big round one?”

The Major cast an apprehensive eye on Miss Mapp seated just opposite, whose acuteness of hearing was one of the terrors of Tilling.... His apprehensions were perfectly well founded, and Miss Mapp hated and despised the Contessa from that hour.

“No, not sisters,” said he, “and your la​—​you've made a little error about the names. The one opposite is Miss Mapp, the other Mrs. Plaistow."

The Contessa moderated her voice.

“I see; she looks vexed, your Miss Mapp. I think she must have heard, and I will be very nice to her afterwards. Why does not one of you gentlemen marry her? I see I shall have to arrange that. The sweet little Scotch clergyman now; little men like big wives. Ah! Married already is he to the mouse? Then it must be you, Captain Flint. We must have more marriages in Tilling.”

Miss Mapp could not help glancing at the Contessa, as