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THE TRAGICAL COMEDY OF
[PUNCH.

Punch. So you doctors always say. Try how you like it yourself.

Doctor. We never take our own physic, if we can help it. (hits him) A little more, Mr. Punch, and you will soon be well.

(hits him;during this part of the dialogue, the Doctor hunts Punch to different parts of the stage, and at last gets him into a corner, and belabours him until Punch seems almost stunned)

Punch. Oh, Doctor! Doctor! no more, no more! enough physic for me; I am quite well now.

Doctor. Only another dose. (hits him)

Punch. No more!—turn and turn about is all fair, you know. (Punch makes a desperate effort, closes with the Doctor, and after a struggle, succeeds in getting the stick from him) Now, Doctor, your turn to be physicked. (beating the Doctor[1])

Doctor. Hold, Mr. Punch; I don't want any physic, my good sir.

Punch. Oh, yes, you do; you very bad; you must take it; I the doctor now.[2] (hits him) How do you like physic? (hits) It will do you good, (hits) This will soon cure you: (hits) physic! (hits) physic! (hits) physic! (hits)

Doctor. Oh, pray, Mr. Punch, no more! one pill of that physic is a dose.

Punch. Doctors always die when they take their own physic, (hits him) Another small dose, and you never want physic again, (hits him) There, don't you feel the physic in your inside? (Punch thrusts the end of the stick into the Doctor's stomach; the Doctor falls down dead, and Punch, as before, tosses away the body with the end of his staff) He, he, he! (laughing) Now, Doctor, you may cure
  1. We cannot call Punch lethargicus, but, at all events
    ————"fit pugil et medicum urget."

    As one of our old translators has it,

    "He knocks down the quack
    On the flat of his back."

  2. "He will be the physician that should be the patient."
    "Troilus and Cressida," Act 2.