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THE TRAGICAL COMEDY OF

Though I really am sorry to say, sirs,
That that is too often her way, sirs.
For this, by and by, she shall pay, sirs.
Oh, wives are an obstinate set!

Judy, my dear! (calling) Judy, my love—pretty Judy, come up stairs.

Enter Judy.

Judy. Well, here I am! what do you want, now I'm come?

Punch, (aside) What a pretty creature! An't she one beauty?

Judy. What do you want, I say?

Punch. A kiss! a pretty kiss! (kisses her, while she hits him a slap on the face)

Judy. Take that then: how do you like my kisses? Will you have another?

Punch. No; one at a time, one at a time, my sweet pretty wife, (aside) She always is so playful. Where's the child? Fetch me the child, Judy, my dear.

Exit Judy.

Punch. (solus) There's one wife for you! What a precious darling creature? She go to fetch our child.[1]


  1. The MS. to which we are very much indebted for the musical department of our drama, supplies another stanza to the tune of "Malbroug," which we have excluded from the text, as it contains already two specimens of the kind, and the simile regarding her voice is used afterwards. It is, however, worth adding in a note. Punch sings it after he has received the slap on the face, and while Judy is gone for the child:

    My wife is a beautiful darling,
    And though her tongue goes like a starling,
    We seldom have fighting or snarling.
    Her voice is delightful to hear!
    But take care you don't get too near;
    Sometimes her behaviour is queer:
    With her hands she has always been handy.
    I must doctor my face with some brandy,
    And sweetened with white sugar-candy,
    I'll take it inside, never fear.