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Twelfe Night, or, What you will.
As there is no true Cuckold but calamity, so beauties
a flower; The Lady bad take away the foole, therefore I
say againe, take her away.
a flower; The Lady bad take away the foole, therefore I
say againe, take her away.
Ol.
Sir, I bad them take away you.
Sir, I bad them take away you.
Clo.
Misprision in the highest degree. Lady, Cucullus
non facit monachum: that's as much to say, as I weare not
motley in my braine: good Madona, giue mee leaue to
proue you a foole.
Misprision in the highest degree. Lady, Cucullus
non facit monachum: that's as much to say, as I weare not
motley in my braine: good Madona, giue mee leaue to
proue you a foole.
Ol.
Can you do it?
Can you do it?
Clo.
Dexteriously, good Madona.
Dexteriously, good Madona.
Ol.
Make your proofe.
Make your proofe.
Clo.
I must catechize you for it Madona, Good my
Mouse of vertue answer mee.
I must catechize you for it Madona, Good my
Mouse of vertue answer mee.
Ol.
Well sir, for want of other idlenesse, Ile bide your proofe.
Well sir, for want of other idlenesse, Ile bide your proofe.
Clo.
Good Madona, why mournst thou?
Good Madona, why mournst thou?
Ol.
Good foole, for my brothers death.
Good foole, for my brothers death.
Clo.
I thinke his soule is in hell, Madona.
I thinke his soule is in hell, Madona.
Ol.
I know his soule is in heauen, foole.
I know his soule is in heauen, foole.
Clo.
The more foole (Madona) to mourne for your Brothers
soule, being in heauen. Take away the Foole, Gentlemen.
The more foole (Madona) to mourne for your Brothers
soule, being in heauen. Take away the Foole, Gentlemen.
Ol.
What thinke you of this foole Maluolio, doth he not mend?
What thinke you of this foole Maluolio, doth he not mend?
Mal.
Yes, and shall do, till the pangs of death shake
him: Infirmity that decaies the wise, doth euer make the
better foole.
Yes, and shall do, till the pangs of death shake
him: Infirmity that decaies the wise, doth euer make the
better foole.
Clow.
God send you sir, a speedie Infirmity, for the
better increasing your folly: Sir Toby will be sworn that
I am no Fox, but he wil not passe his word for two pence
that you are no Foole.
God send you sir, a speedie Infirmity, for the
better increasing your folly: Sir Toby will be sworn that
I am no Fox, but he wil not passe his word for two pence
that you are no Foole.
Ol.
How say you to that Maluolio?
How say you to that Maluolio?
Mal.
I maruell your Ladyship takes delight in such
a barren rascall: I saw him put down the other day, with
an ordinary foole, that has no more braine then a stone.
Looke you now, he's out of his gard already: vnles you
laugh and minister occasion to him, he is gag'd. I protest
I take these Wisemen, that crow so at these set kinde of
fooles, no better then the fooles Zanies.
I maruell your Ladyship takes delight in such
a barren rascall: I saw him put down the other day, with
an ordinary foole, that has no more braine then a stone.
Looke you now, he's out of his gard already: vnles you
laugh and minister occasion to him, he is gag'd. I protest
I take these Wisemen, that crow so at these set kinde of
fooles, no better then the fooles Zanies.
Ol.
O you are sicke of selfe-loue Maluolio, and taste
with a distemper'd appetite. To be generous, guiltlesse,
and of free disposition, is to take those things for Bird-bolts,
that you deeme Cannon bullets: There is no slander
in an allow'd foole, though he do nothing but rayle;
nor no rayling, in a knowne discreet man, though hee do
nothing but reproue.
O you are sicke of selfe-loue Maluolio, and taste
with a distemper'd appetite. To be generous, guiltlesse,
and of free disposition, is to take those things for Bird-bolts,
that you deeme Cannon bullets: There is no slander
in an allow'd foole, though he do nothing but rayle;
nor no rayling, in a knowne discreet man, though hee do
nothing but reproue.
Clo.
Now Mercury indue thee with leasing, for thou
speak'st well of fooles.
Now Mercury indue thee with leasing, for thou
speak'st well of fooles.
Enter Maria.
Mar.
Madam, there is at the gate, a young Gentleman,
much desires to speake with you.
Madam, there is at the gate, a young Gentleman,
much desires to speake with you.
Ol.
From the Count Orsino, is it?
From the Count Orsino, is it?
Ma
I know not (Madam) 'tis a faire young man, and
well attended.
I know not (Madam) 'tis a faire young man, and
well attended.
Ol.
Who of my people hold him in delay?
Who of my people hold him in delay?
Ma.
Sir Toby Madam, your kinsman.
Sir Toby Madam, your kinsman.
Ol.
Fetch him off I pray you, he speakes nothing but
madman: Fie on him. Go you Maluolio; If it be a suit
from the Count, I am sicke, or not at home. What you
Exit Maluo.will, to dismisse it.
Now you see sir, how your fooling growes old, & people
dislike it.
Fetch him off I pray you, he speakes nothing but
madman: Fie on him. Go you Maluolio; If it be a suit
from the Count, I am sicke, or not at home. What you
Exit Maluo.will, to dismisse it.
Now you see sir, how your fooling growes old, & people
dislike it.
Clo.
Thou hast spoke for vs (Madona) as if thy eldest
sonne should be a foole: whose scull, Ioue cramme with
braines, for heere he comes.
Enter Sir Toby.
One of thy kin has a most weake Pia-mater.
Thou hast spoke for vs (Madona) as if thy eldest
sonne should be a foole: whose scull, Ioue cramme with
braines, for heere he comes.
Enter Sir Toby.
One of thy kin has a most weake Pia-mater.
Ol.
By mine honor halfe drunke. What is he at the gate Cosin?
By mine honor halfe drunke. What is he at the gate Cosin?
To.
A Gentleman.
A Gentleman.
Ol.
A Gentleman? What Gentleman?
A Gentleman? What Gentleman?
To.
'Tis a Gentleman heere. A plague o'these pickle
herring: How now Sot.
'Tis a Gentleman heere. A plague o'these pickle
herring: How now Sot.
Clo.
Good Sir Toby.
Good Sir Toby.
Ol.
Cosin, Cosin, how haue you come so earely by
this Lethargie?
Cosin, Cosin, how haue you come so earely by
this Lethargie?
To.
Letcherie, I defie Letchery: there's one at the gate
Letcherie, I defie Letchery: there's one at the gate
Ol.
I marry, what is he?
I marry, what is he?
To.
Let him be the diuell and he will, I care not: giue
Exitme faith say I. Well, it's all one.
Let him be the diuell and he will, I care not: giue
Exitme faith say I. Well, it's all one.
Ol.
What's a drunken man like, foole?
What's a drunken man like, foole?
Clo.
Like a drown'd man, a foole, and a madde man:
One draught aboue heate, makes him a foole, the second
maddes him, and a third drownes him.
Like a drown'd man, a foole, and a madde man:
One draught aboue heate, makes him a foole, the second
maddes him, and a third drownes him.
Ol.
Go thou and seeke the Crowner, and let him sitte
o'my Coz: for he's in the third degree of drinke: hee's
drown'd: go looke after him.
Go thou and seeke the Crowner, and let him sitte
o'my Coz: for he's in the third degree of drinke: hee's
drown'd: go looke after him.
Clo.
He is but mad yet Madona, and the foole shall
looke to the madman.
He is but mad yet Madona, and the foole shall
looke to the madman.
Enter Maluolio.
Mal.
Madam, yond young fellow sweares hee will
speake with you. I told him you were sicke, he takes on
him to vnderstand so much, and therefore comes to speak
with you. I told him you were asleepe, he seems to haue
a fore knowledge of that too, and therefore comes to
speake with you. What is to be said to him Ladie, hee's
fortified against any deniall.
Madam, yond young fellow sweares hee will
speake with you. I told him you were sicke, he takes on
him to vnderstand so much, and therefore comes to speak
with you. I told him you were asleepe, he seems to haue
a fore knowledge of that too, and therefore comes to
speake with you. What is to be said to him Ladie, hee's
fortified against any deniall.
Ol.
Tell him, he shall not speake with me.
Tell him, he shall not speake with me.
Mal.
Ha's beene told so: and hee sayes hee'l stand at
your doore like a Sheriffes post, and be the supporter to
a bench, but hee'l speake with you.
Ha's beene told so: and hee sayes hee'l stand at
your doore like a Sheriffes post, and be the supporter to
a bench, but hee'l speake with you.
Ol.
What kinde o'man is he?
What kinde o'man is he?
Mal.
Why of mankinde.
Why of mankinde.
Ol.
What manner of man?
What manner of man?
Mal.
Of verie ill manner: hee'l speake with you, will
you, or no.
Of verie ill manner: hee'l speake with you, will
you, or no.
Ol.
Of what personage, and yeeres is he?
Of what personage, and yeeres is he?
Mal.
Not yet old enough for a man, nor yong enough
for a boy: as a squash is before tis a pescod, or a Codling
when tis almost an Apple: Tis with him in standing
water, betweene boy and man. He is verie well-fauour'd,
and he speakes verie shrewishly: One would thinke his
mothers milke were scarse out of him.
Not yet old enough for a man, nor yong enough
for a boy: as a squash is before tis a pescod, or a Codling
when tis almost an Apple: Tis with him in standing
water, betweene boy and man. He is verie well-fauour'd,
and he speakes verie shrewishly: One would thinke his
mothers milke were scarse out of him.
Ol.
Let him approach: Call in my Gentlewoman.
Let him approach: Call in my Gentlewoman.
Mal.
ExitGentlewoman, my Lady calles.
ExitGentlewoman, my Lady calles.
Enter Maria.
Ol.
Giue me my vaile: come throw it ore my face,
Wee'l once more heare Orsinos Embassie.
Giue me my vaile: come throw it ore my face,
Wee'l once more heare Orsinos Embassie.
Enter Violenta.
Vio.
The honorable Ladie of the house, which is she?
The honorable Ladie of the house, which is she?
Ol.
Speake to me, I shall answer for her: your will.
Speake to me, I shall answer for her: your will.
Vio.
Most radiant, exquisite, and vnmatchable beautie.
I pray you tell me if this bee the Lady of the house,
for I neuer saw her. I would bee loath to cast away my
speech: for besides that it is excellently well pend, I haue
taken great paines to con it. Good Beauties, let mee
sustaine no scorne; I am very comptible, euen to the least
sinister vsage.
Most radiant, exquisite, and vnmatchable beautie.
I pray you tell me if this bee the Lady of the house,
for I neuer saw her. I would bee loath to cast away my
speech: for besides that it is excellently well pend, I haue
taken great paines to con it. Good Beauties, let mee
sustaine no scorne; I am very comptible, euen to the least
sinister vsage.
Ol.
Whence came you sir?
Whence came you sir?
Vio.
I can say little more then I haue studied, & that
question's out of my part. Good gentle one, giue mee
modest assurance, if you be the Ladie of the house, that
I can say little more then I haue studied, & that
question's out of my part. Good gentle one, giue mee
modest assurance, if you be the Ladie of the house, that
I
