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JOHNSON WITHOUT BOSWELL
treated the company to sit down and told them if they would call for another bottle they should hear one of his bons mots: they agreed, and he began thus: ‘I was once told that Sheridan the player, in order to improve himself in stage gestures, had looking-glasses, to the number of ten, hung about his room, and that he practised before them; upon which I said, then there were ten ugly fellows together.’ The company were all silent: he asked why they did not laugh, which they not doing, he, without tasting the wine, left the room in anger.

In a large company he once said, ‘Yesterday I heard an excellent story, and I would relate it now if I thought any of you able to understand it.’ The company laughed, and one of them said, ‘Doctor, you are very rude;’ but he made no apology.

‘People,’ said he, ‘are greatly mistaken in me: a notion goes about that when I am silent I mean to be impudent; but I assure you, gentlemen, my silence arises from bashfulness.’

Having one day a call to wait on the late duke, then earl of Northumberland, I found Goldsmith waiting for an audience in an outer room; I asked him what had brought him there: he told me an invitation from his lordship. I made my business as short as I could, and, as a reason, mentioned that Dr. Goldsmith was waiting without. The earl asked me if I was acquainted with him: I told him I was, adding what I thought likely to recommend him. I retired, and staid in the outer room to take him home. Upon his coming out, I asked him the result of his conversation.—‘His lordship,’ says he, ‘told me he had read my poem,’ meaning the Traveller, ‘and was much delighted with it; that he was going lord-lieutenant of Ireland, and that, hearing that I was a native of that country, he should be glad to do me any kindness.’—And what did you answer, asked I, to this gracious offer? ‘Why,’ said he, ‘I could say nothing but that I had a brother there, a clergyman, that stood in need of help: as for myself, I have no dependence on the promises of great men: I look to the booksellers for support; they are my best friends, and I am not inclined to forsake them for others.’ Thus did this idiot, in the